10 insights from 10 years of daily meditation practice
After meditating daily for the past ten years, I gained some insights I'd like to share.
Why it matters?
Aside from bragging about my enviable discipline and persistence... It is my sincerest hope that I can inspire you to give meditation a try or deepen your practice if you are already on the way.
Introduction
The turning point of a journey often comes at unexpected times, and so it did for me. During a challenging period in my 4th year at university in 2012, I found myself entangled in anxiety over upcoming exams, stress over applying for a graduate job, and physical agony from an excruciatingly painful wisdom tooth.
On a dark, rainy night, unable to find sleep's embrace, I stumbled upon Ole Nydahl's book, "The Way Things Are: A Living Approach to Buddhism." A temporarily forgotten gift from a friend. The wisdom contained within its pages resonated deeply with my experience, and I was drawn to the path of mindfulness. Through books like John Kabat-Zinn's "Wherever You Go There You Are," I began to see a new horizon. My first meditation on 13th July 2013 marked the beginning of what would become a 10-year daily practice.
The stillness of that first meditation still resonates within me, and I wish to share with you 10 insights that have shaped my understanding.
I've divided these insights into View, Expectations, and Practice.
View
1. There is no "I" behind thoughts, feelings, and actions.
The sense of 'I' as a solid entity behind my thoughts, feelings, and actions dissolves with deep meditation. Neuroscience tells us that the 'I' is a mental construct, a byproduct of complex interactions in the brain. I've seen and experienced that in the silent depths of meditation. One realizes there is no permanent self to cling to, echoing the ancient wisdom of non-self found in spiritual traditions. Seeing this in meditation doesn't mean I've forever transcended the sense of self. Instead, such glimpses help me not to take my "self" so seriously.
2. There is no cause and effect.
The idea of causality, the linear connection between cause and effect, is seen as a mental construct that does not hold in absolute reality. In deep contemplation, I've experienced the interconnectedness of all things, where the idea of isolated cause and effect loses meaning. Have I surrendered from taking action and feeling responsible? Of course, not. I just have a broader perspective on what I feel I can control (my actions) vs what I cannot (outcomes).
3. There is no time.
Like other concepts, time becomes relative in the face of meditation's eternal present. Quantum physics suggests the illusory nature of time, and I've experienced this truth directly in meditation. Timelessness becomes a felt experience, and one may find oneself dwelling in the ever-present now. This doesn't mean I sold my watch or am late for meetings. The social contract of time we've all signed as humans is still important. My body has a shelf life. So despite seeing its illusory nature, I'm still very respectful of time and trying to use it as effectively as I can.
Expectations
4. Meditation is not what you think.
As it unfolded for me, meditation was never about silencing the mind or achieving a permanent state of concentration. Although awareness and emotional stability have improved somewhat, they were not the ultimate goals. Rather, the sensitivity to the fluctuations of thoughts and emotions has deepened. This is a paradox of meditation - the clearer the mirror of the mind, the more clearly one sees both the tranquillity and the turmoil. It's not about reaching a final state but engaging with whatever arises. Because of the heightened sensitivity, I sometimes experience the waves of life's uncertainty more vividly. Still, there is also more calm underneath…
5. Meditation is not about self-improvement.
Initially, the idea of becoming a "better person" might have lured me. Over time, however, my focus shifted from self-improvement to self-understanding. In closely observing flaws and habits, I recognized them, embraced them, and found a way to live more harmoniously with them. As a side effect, this observation and acceptance also gradually dissolved some of my flaws, making me a better company for myself and those around me.
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6. Meditation is about getting to know yourself better.
It's a profound study of the human experience, where the laboratory is one's own body and mind. This intimate exploration has led me to self-awareness and fostered an understanding of what it means to be me as a human. It has expanded my empathy, kindness, and connection to others too.
7. Meditation is about here and now.
Some sessions are profoundly peaceful, others scattered and filled with mental chatter. Experience matters, yet it doesn't. Each meditation is a new encounter with the present moment. There is a profound acceptance of what is, here and now, regardless of prior experiences. Nike's slogan "Just do it" becomes a mantra for a dedicated practice, a reminder that it's about showing up, again and again. And that's exactly what I do. Do I always feel like meditating? Of course, not. My ego would often do whatever it takes to convince me not to meditate. "I'm tired", "I have other things to do", "I'm wasting time", "I can skip today", "I can do something else instead"… The list of BS the ego comes up with is endless. My response was – "Just shut up and sit!"
Practice
8. Make it a habit.
Consistency has been the cornerstone for me. By linking meditation to daily routines like waking up and going to bed, it became a non-negotiable part of my day. Every day, even briefly, I would find the time to sit, breathe, and be. That has amounted to 3,650 consecutive days, a testament to the transformative power of habit. Just find what works for you. Put it in your calendar if you must. Look at other habits you perform consistently. Replicate this so that you can make meditation a daily habit.
9. Keep it simple.
Complexity can be a barrier. Initially, I found solace in guided meditations from trusted teachers, who were not aligned to any specific religious or philosophical paths. Simplicity fostered engagement, so my advice here is not to overthink or overcomplicate. Find a method that resonates and embrace it wholeheartedly. Let your own continued practice take care of the rest.
10. Trust your body and breath.
My breath and body posture became the reliable and ever-present anchors of my attention. By befriending them, they became gentle guides through the subtle terrains of inner experience. Trust in these natural aspects of being fostered a deeper connection to the meditation process. Over the years, I've tried various methods. I've always come back again and again to my posture and breath.
Answers to questions you may have
Have I skipped any days?
No, I haven't. I've consciously dedicated at least five minutes to meditation every single day for the past ten years.
How long do I meditate?
My practice evolved from 5 minutes twice daily to peaking at three sessions of 40 minutes. The journey led back to 2 sessions of 30 minutes, with a good average of 60 minutes a day over the past ten years. This average is based on days when I've done shorter sessions and days and weeks where I've been practising for up to four hours a day at meditation retreats.
What type of meditation do I do?
My exploration began with Jon Kabat-Zinn's mindfulness and his guided meditations, ventured into Tibetan Buddhism, and found a home in Zen. More specifically, seated meditation called "zazen", remarkably similar to Kabat-Zinn's teachings. This has been the staple of my practice since 21st June 2014 – the first day I stepped into and practised in a Zen Dojo in London, UK.
Conclusion
Ten years may seem like a long time, but it is a brief moment in the grand scope of existence. These insights from my daily meditation practice have been a beacon, guiding my way through the complexities of life. They have shaped my understanding of myself and my connection to the world around me.
The journey continues to unfold, and with it comes a deeper appreciation for the simplicity and profound beauty of being present. May these reflections inspire a gentle reminder that the path to peace, understanding, and true wisdom lies within, awaiting your exploration.
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1yRespect brother Martin Petkov I normally do 15 mins a day but only been doing it regularly for 6 months. How long do you normally sit for?
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1yThanks for the support and kind comments, and insightful personal messages, everyone!🙏 They say mastery takes ~10,000 hours. With ~3,650 under my belt, I'm 1/3 in. Hope to be able to report back in 20 years. Be well M
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1yMartin Petkov agree on consistency being key in practice and everything 👍