Dimon Warns Google, Bayer Welcomes Merck and Other News You Need to Know

GOOGLE BANK — Who's taking Facebook and Google seriously as financial institutions? No less than JP Morgan Chase & Co chief executive Jamie Dimon. And (perhaps expectedly) he's warning them off. "There's no way that Google wants to be a regulated bank," Dimon said at the Euromoney Saudi Arabia conference in Riyadh, according to Bloomberg. Dimon knows whereof he speaks: Chase agreed to fines exceeding $20 million billion last year to settle a barrage of government legal actions last year. As the New York Times has noted, that sum "could cover the annual education budget of New York City or finance the Yankees’ payroll for 100 years," but Chase took it in stride. That's because, as Dimon noted at the conference: "We move $10 trillion a day." Google, with Wallet and Facebook, which is seeking to trial a PayPal-like service in Ireland, have a long way to go to become banks. But, of course, they don't want to become banks. They only want to nose into the lucrative, low-barrier-to-entry money transfer biz, not manage checking accounts and vet loans. Which is probably what really has the Jamie Dimons of the world nervous.

_____

BIG PHARMA GETS BIGGER — Bayer is buying Merck's consumer care division for $14.2 billion, which will make it the second largest over-the-counter drugs company after Johnson & Johnson. As Reuters reports, overtaking J&J is a strategic goal. Bayer, which invented aspirin, now adds allergy-treatment Claritin and nasal decongestant Afrin to its portfolio. And, as part of the deal, Bayer and Merck agreed to collaborate on heart medications, including Ademas and vericiguat, currently in Phase 2 trials.

_____

SILENCE WORTH A MILLION DOLLARS — Facebook is certainly trying to thread the needle with its new video ad strategy. So far it's basically invite-only and comes with conditions most advertisers would bristle at, like audio off by default. But "a small group" of advertisers seem to be testing it out — at an average of $1 million a piece for one day on the site, the Wall Street Journal reports. The revenue stream is important because Facebook is essentially an advertising medium now. But the audience is fickle, and can't be expected to absorb too many jolting changes too quickly — like loud videos in their news streams. Still, for the right advertiser, it might be a perfect buy.

"I wouldn't say every category of advertiser is clamoring for [the ads] at this moment," said Kris Magel, chief investment officer at Initiative, an ad-buying unit of Interpublic Group of Cos. "It might make sense for someone who needs to make a big splash on a given day," he said, such as a studio promoting a new movie or a retailer with a big sale.

From these humble beginnings at least one analyst, Arvind Bhatia of Stern Agee, estimates this would be a $1 billion business by next year.

_____

SO WHAT? — So, here's something you probably never realized … Starting a sentence with "so" is a terrible idea. In a guest post in Fast Company consultant Hunter Thurman says everybody does is — and nobody should.

Everyone — from CMOs to flip-flop-clad “brogrammers” — does it. It’s like the technorati’s way of starting a sentence with “like.” However, it’s much more than that. It’s actually a damaging tendency. Beginning your sentence with “so” orients your message and subconsciously alerts your audience that what you’re about to say is different than what you’ve been talking about up until this point.

So, what's the impact? It insults your audience, undermines your credibility and tells everyone you aren't really that confident about what you are about to say.

So, get with it, already.

_____

OK GOOGLE: IT'S ON ME — Maybe you won't mind your buddy wearing Google Glass at dinner after all. Google is said to be introducing their payment system Wallet to the wearable, making it possible to say "send money" and actually have it happen instead of it just being a hollow note-to-self you hope your companions will forget. According to the Techcrunch exclusive, the feature is being tested internally now, "but chances are it will launch to all Glass users in the near future."

Photo: Sashkin / shutterstock

Remix: LinkedIn Pulse

*****

Would you use the Bank of Google or Facebook? Suddenly self-conscious about your speaking ability?

Comment below or write your own post. Share the URL here in the comments mentioning me or Tweet @LinkedInPulse. (Want to write, but don't yet have access?Leave your info here.)