Building a self-care toolkit

If the last couple of years have reminded me of anything, it’s that life doesn’t always proceed smoothly. When day-to-day challenges become difficult to handle, our emotional health can take a tumble, especially if our fuel tank is already low.

When we feel physically and emotionally well, of course it’s easier to navigate stressors in healthy and productive ways. That’s what makes self-care — practices that promote mind and body wellness — so important.

One of the many lessons I learnt following personal trauma and a subsequent mental breakdown, is that if you don’t already have some good habits in place, then it’s incredibly hard to start this journey, even more so if you’re already overwhelmed.

Self-care doesn’t look the same for everyone and there’s no one-size-fits-all wellbeing checklist. What works when we have low mood/energy might be very different from the action we need to take when we’re feeling anxious or highly strung. So, how are you supposed to know what works for you?

In the first instance, we need to be self-aware. It’s important to think about the needs not currently being met in our lives and the self-care actions that uniquely fit to meet those needs. A solid self-care checklist/wellbeing toolkit will reflect your specific needs, habits and time considerations.

Choosing activities and actions that are meaningful and personal to each of us is vital. When we identify what brings us happiness, connection, calm, joy, etc – we can consciously implement strategies that actually work for our unique/individual needs.

It might take a little effort to develop, but you’ll probably find this investment entirely worth it in the long run.

First, a few things to ask yourself throughout the process:

Will I actually do this? Your self-care plan won’t have much benefit if you don’t put it into action. If you truly don’t see yourself sticking with something, then it’s not for you (at this point). Just remember that there are plenty of other options if you stop and think about it.

Is it going to create financial stress? There was a point in my life, about ten years ago, where I was living on $2 per day for all my food and fun (after paying essential bills). Self-care strategies that cost money simply weren’t an option. Thankfully, there are many free activities and strategies that make me feel good – from walks in nature, to time with friends and family, we don’t need to spend big to look after ourselves.

If money is less of concern, you might decide to join a gym with the goal of exercising more. If you only stop in once a week, you might end up feeling more stressed by the cost of your membership than recharged from the increased activity. At the same time, there’s nothing wrong with spending money on something that really works for you. A good rule of thumb is to make sure the cost doesn’t increase your stress.

Am I trying to do too much? You can burn yourself out on self-care. Overloading your schedule with activities meant to boost wellness can leave you feeling the opposite of relaxed. Too many commitments, even enjoyable ones, tend to increase stress, if you’re left without time to simply sit and process your own thoughts — another essential part of self-care.

Do I have the time? When it comes to self-care, best practice means regular practice. Self-care should happen all the time, not just when you feel most stressed. Try to make self-care goals you can accommodate alongside work and other responsibilities. And remember, they don’t have to be hour-long practices — even a few minutes spent on self-care can have significant benefits, especially when done daily.

What’s worked in the past? Think of a time when you felt relatively happy and positive about life, even if you have to go back to when you were a kid. What contributed to this mindset? Self-care is most beneficial when it’s informed by your own story; specific memories can help recreate calm and wellness in your life. As you begin to identify key moments and actions that helped you find peace before, explore ways to incorporate them into your present life.

Get back to basics

Physical self-care includes the things that help keep your body functioning well. These things will have a positive knock-on effect on your mental wellbeing, too. Afterall, when your body is feeling well, it’s one less thing your brain has to stress about.

Sleep. Most adults need around 7 to 9 hours of sleep each night. Not getting enough quality sleep on a regular basis can affect your mood, concentration, and health. While it’s pretty common not to get the recommended amount of sleep, you can often improve both the quantity and quality of your sleep on your own.

Your body craves predictability. When you go to bed at the same time every night and wake up at the same time every morning, it finds it easier to fall into deep, restorative sleep.

Similarly, limit consumption of alcohol and keep intake of caffeine to before noon, as they can both compromise the quality of your sleep.

Nutrition. Good nutrition has a HUGE impact on your overall health. Physically and mentally.

Did you know that we have 100 trillion bacteria in our guts weighing 200 grams? Promoting a healthy gut microbiome – by eating a varied and fibre-rich diet – can improve everything, from weight to mood and immunity.

Did you know that 70-80 per cent of your immunity is hosted in your gut, and 80-90 per cent of your serotonin (the body’s natural anti-depressant) is manufactured in your gut too?  

Get outside. As little as 20 minutes spent outside in natural light, each day, can improve energy, mood and sleep quality:

• Improve your mood. Exposing your eyes to natural light stimulates the production of serotonin, our body’s natural antidepressant
• Reduce fatigue. Exposing your eyes to natural light also suppresses melatonin, the hormone that makes you feel sleepy
• Sleep better. Adequate exposure to sunlight during the day and darkness at night will help regulate the hormones that help you fall asleep at night.

Exercise. Regular exercise is a great stress buster. Doing at least 30 minutes of moderate-intensity physical activity on most days of the week has been shown to improve mood and decrease anxiety and stress.

If 30 minutes is a struggle, even five minutes a day of outdoor exercise can improve mood and self-esteem. Every bit counts

Exercising can feel like an unpleasant chore when you don’t like what you’re doing. If you choose something that feels fun or recreational, you’ll probably want to do it more often. Try to find a sport of activity you love doing, so you actually turn up.

Physical intimacy. People often use ‘intimacy’ as a stand-in for ‘sex.’ But other types of physical contact also play an important role in wellness. Oxytocin is known as the ‘hug-drug’ because the good feelings it offers are released through connection with others, including touch. Touch is a basic human need, and touch starvation can have health consequences.

Looking for some self-care strategies that fulfil touch needs? Try getting a massage, hugging a loved one, getting a pet or volunteering to pet-sit.

The bottom line

When choosing strategies and actions to support better mental and physical wellbeing, identify what’s meaningful to you. Think about what makes you feel happy, calm and/or more connected! What works for one person, won’t necessarily work for others. And, when you discover what recharges your personal batteries, make sure you put it into daily practice.

Help for workplaces

My Everyday Wellbeing is an excellent tool for workplaces to help their staff self-manage their health, wellbeing and self-care strategies, daily. It has all the advice and tools needed to build and maintain and healthy lifestyle and, as part of this programme, we offer an interactive workshop that’s focused on helping each person identify actions that benefit them and help recharge their personal resilience batteries. Get in touch to learn how we can help support your staff and wellbeing leads.