Child Discipline framework

1. Punishment is directed at the objectionable behavior, and the child will accept its consequence without resentment. It is a response that is directed at the individual.
2. Discipline is a response that is directed at the individual. It represents a desire of one person to hurt another; and it is an expression of hostility rather than corrective love.
3. Corporal Punishment is any punishment in which physical, non physical force and other forms are/is used intended to cause some degree of pain or discomfort, however light.
4. Scolding and ridiculing the child is a form of corporal punishment.
5. Among equally important reasons, a positive approach to child discipline builds a mutually respectful relationship with students and among students

Understanding why children behave as they do

Methodology: individual work and plenary discussion (5 minutes work and 10 minutes discussion)Notes to Facilitator  This might be tough. Not many will be ready to openly admit actions in the past.  Remind participants then that they will not be identified with what they wrote or their cards;  This activity is a springboard and source of information for this and succeeding sessions;  Only those who are willing to share in plenary will be encouraged; and,  Exert effort to process the feelings with finality or closure so that they feel better if necessary, suggest referral to an expert when appropriate.

PROCEDURES

 Distribute 2 cards and a marker or pen to each participants.

 Instruct them to write on one (1) card a disciplining action, they cannot forget, done to a child* that they think is negative. At the back of the card, and using a pencil or ball pen, write the reason for doing so. indicate age and sex

 On the other card, write a disciplining action, they cannot forget, done to a child that they think is positive. At the back of the card, and using a pencil or ball pen, write the reason for doing so. * indicate age and sex

 Remind them to put an identifying mark on both their cards for reference.

 Ask for volunteers from each group/section to organize the cards according to age and sex and into – and +.

 Post these.

Processing and data gathering

 For everyone: How did you feel when you were recalling the actions?

 What was going on in your mind when you were jotting down the reasons for your actions?  What insights came about?

 For those who are willing to share: For the negative, if given a chance, how would you now have responded or acted?

 For those who are willing to share: For the positive, if given a chance, how would you have done better?

Synthesis

 There are truly valid underlying reasons why we, particularly the children, behave as we or they do.

 Often, adults’ responses to children’s behaviours do not match the reasons for these as well as the children’s age and gender requisites. (Child Development stage)

 Thus, leaving adults’ with unresolved guilt and a scarred child for life.

Key learning points

 Every girl or boy - child displays characteristics and behaviours indicating the state of development they are in.

 These are healthy, normal and necessary for their development.

 However, adults often perceive these behaviours as negative and wrong.

 Kaya, the child gets to be labelled all throughout their childhood life and beyond.

Understanding why children behave as they do

Categories of negative behaviours displayed by children based on four (4) underlying causes: 1. Attention seeking 2. Showing power 3. Revenge 4. Feeling inadequate

Underlying Cause or Examples Child’s Reaction Reason

Temporarily stopping the Attention Seeking Playing tricks and jokes on adults or behaviour before repeating it or their peers Starting another behaviour Dressing differently that will attract the adult’s Attracting attention Crying and making noise attention

If adult uses his or her own power to respond, the child may resist more strongly or reluctantly obey, making Displaying aggression, fighting, their reluctance obvious. challenging, teasing Showing Power This may escalate into a Becoming disobedient and power struggle between uncooperative adult and the child. If the adult gives up, the child usually stop the behaviour.

The child has a passive gives up on tasks easily reaction or no reaction at Does not make any effort Expression of feelings of all Does not participate inadequacy He or she hopes that the skips or drops out of school adult will give u and leave Escapes through alcohol and drugs him or her alone

Synthesis & Learning point

 Children have different personalities like adults.

 They come from families with varying values, political, religious and economic orientations.  They, too, have different values and beliefs.

 Adults have to accept and understand its manifestations.

Discipline versus Punishment

Notes

 Remind the participants that the sharing is confidential. There may be participants who are willing to or uncomfortable with this exercise – so it is okay not to share.

 Request only for memories from those who are truly ready to share with other

 Exert effort to process the feelings with finality/closure so that they feel better if necessary, suggest referral to an expert.

 Make sure you are able to refer the participants’ responses to the information that will be provided on the succeeding lectures in this module.

Objectives

At the end of the session, the participants will be able to:

 Differentiate the concept and effects of corporal punishment

 Serve as springboard and resource for the discussions on corporal punishment and positive approaches to disciplining children in various settings Materials

 Markers/ pens  VIPP cards

Procedures

1. Group participants into three or four and by gender or by division

2. In 3 minutes, recall all the positive and negative experiences in your childhood - how you were disciplined home?

3. Which experiences stand out? Choose one (1) each. Jot on VIPP cards

4. Collate and post only outstanding experiences on a big sheet of paper ( paper/flip chart or a blank wall) or any big blank wall or board

Processing / Data Gathering

 How did you feel when you were recalling your experiences?

 How do you feel now that you are an adult?

 If you were an adult then, what would you have done?

Child Protection Policy

 What realisations can you make out of the responses given?

Punishment - Is a response that is directed at the individual. It represents a desire of one person to hurt another; and, it is an expression of hostility rather than corrective love.

Discipline - Is directed at the objectionable behavior; and the child will accept its consequence without resentment.

Corporal punishment - Is any punishment in which physical, non physical force and other forms are/is used intended to cause some degree of pain or discomfort, however light. (Definition of the Uncommitted on the Rights of the Child)

Physical forms of Punishment:

 Hitting, ‘smacking’, ‘slapping’, ‘spanking’ children, with the hand or with an implement – i.e.

 a whip  spoon, fork and knives (wooden or  Stick (wooden or whatever) whatever)  belt,  hanger  shoe, any foot wear  Pointer, Etc.

 But it can also involve:  Kicking  forcing children to stay in  shaking or throwing children uncomfortable positions,  Scratching  Letting the child be exposed to the  Pinching elements for  Biting  a period of time  pulling hair or boxing ears  Burning  Forced ingestion, etc.

Non-physical form of Punishment:Includes but not limited to the ff: Belittles  Bullies Humiliates  Scares or Denigrates  Ridicules the child Scolds  Letting the child do seemingly ‘safe’ Scapegoats activities to the extreme …. Threatens  Withdraws usual support

Child Protection Policy Effects of corporal Punishment / Punishment  Creates fear in the child.  Engenders feelings of confusion, resentment and anger.  Lowers the child’s self esteem.  Engenders a more external locus of control.  Carries a strong potential for escalation.  Trains a child to use violence. Perpetuates the cycle of violence within families  Is associated with more behavioral problems.  Adversely affects the child’s cognitive functioning.  Stunts internalisation of moral values and capacity for empathy.

When discipline is considered harmful or abusive?  The discipline act is  not commensurate to the offence committed by the child;  used frequently and without valid reason;  not appropriate to the age, gender, physical and mental state of the child.  done due to impulsive anger with the purpose of hurting the child;  Child sustains physical or non-physical injuries and is in pain especially the vulnerable parts of the body  If it humiliates the person of the child

Synthesis/ Learning point  Our actions and perspectives differ as we age.  Thus, there are acts which we commit that we regret doing.

Session 4: Positive approach to child discipline“No violence against children is justifiable; all violence against children is preventable.

WHY Positive Approach to Child Discipline?

It has been proven that: Violence against children in schools, homes, community, care and justice institutions,the workplace, and, cyberspace exist Evidences:

When discipline is considered a positive approach?

 It does not mean punishment or conflict between parents, significant adults and child.  Requires… Flexibility from the parents/teachers, using different strategies to match child’s growth and development.

Child Protection Policy

 It means helping a child learn from mistakes and develop self control.

 All children need the security that comes with knowing the rules and boundaries of behavior; without these guidelines they feel at a loss.

 Builds a mutually respectful relationships with child and among siblings and peers or student among students

When discipline is considered a positive approach?

 Provides consistent:  Clear communication  Reinforcement of expectations, agreements or rules  Child and Human Rights Based  Safeguards the Rights of Children  STOPS, LOOKS, LISTENS

Positive Discipline as one of the Approaches

 is part of an education process.  It is a way of thinking and an approach to parenting and teaching that:  Helps children develop  appropriate thinking and behavior in the short and long-term.  self-discipline and confidence.  Guides children to be in harmony with self and others.  Teaches life-long skills and values  Builds a culture of respect for human rights Save the Children

The Practice of Positive Discipline in Schools Premised on Child Rights and Pedagogical Principles, it involves: Setting long-term goals for children which entail defining the kind of people they should be. This serves as the teachers’ motivation for exercising positive discipline. Providing Warmth and Structure or boundaries are the essential tools needed in practising positive discipline and establishing a loving, respectful and non-violent environment that facilitates learning.

Child Development and Recognising Individual Differences require knowing children’s needs and concerns at various ages in consideration of their gender and varying contexts.This is very important to more effective guidance, teaching and support for the students.Problem Solving and Responding with Positive Discipline using all the above in developing an effective response in addressing day-to-day teaching and parenting challenges. This includes use of life skills such as critical and creative thinking, empathy, effective communication and active listening, negotiation, nonviolent conflict resolution, decision making and healthy management of emotions.

Basic Life skills 1. Self-awareness 5. Decision-making 2. Interpersonal relationship 6. Critical Thinking 3. Empathy 7. Creative Thinking 4. Problem-solving 8. Coping with Emotions 9. Coping with Stress 10. Communication

Positive Discipline Guidelines

 Set Guidelines with clear expectations  Establish clearly your expectations  Explain the reason for rules  Encourage the child’s independent thinking and negotiation skills  Teach the children about the effects of their action; providing information on how to make a good decision.  Provide unconditional support… will help the child succeed  Stop, look and Listen…  Manage stress …. Control anger  Be fair and flexible  Check the causes of that behavior  Take “time-in” for regular updating and dialogue  Administer discipline in private  Administer discipline firmly, thoroughly and with consistency.

Session 5: HOW Positive Approach to Child Discipline can be the practice in School (Case Management)

Methodology: group discussion, plenary presentation

At the end of the activity, the participants will be able to:

 Describe and,

 demonstrate positive approaches to child discipline in handling specific children behavior

 Show how application of the Child Protection Policy in School

Procedure

 Develop and demonstrate positive approaches to disciplining children in the homes, school and community

 List chronologically and discuss the series of actions that will be undertaken with regard the case and with reference to the Child Protection Policy and other pertinent policies (State and Agency)

 Identify all the child protection service providers that will be involved in the case and the significant role each play

Processing

 What did you feel during the activity?

 What is your opinion to the situations shared?

 What can you say about the output of group A, B, C, D…?

 What insights have you as a result of the activity?

Synthesis/ learning Points

 Positive approaches to child discipline, greatly influence the progressive and holistic growth and development of the child.

 It can help the child achieve his or her potential skills; it likewise creates an attitude of optimism towards life and its environment.

 Parents, significant adults, teachers and school personnel who are prime movers of positive approach to child discipline contribute immensely to the total personality of the child as part of the home, school and community.

 Most importantly, through the practice of positive approaches in disciplining and enforcement of the School based Child Protection Policy, the child will live in a safe, sound, and violence-free home, community and school environment.

 We can prevent the occurrence of disciplining situations.

 The practice of a Human and child-rights based parenting, teaching and child care giving on top present strategies contributes to zero incidence of disciplining situations, abuse and violence of children

 Widening our indexes of suspicion with regard the behaviour of the child helps in the identification of the root causes of so.

 Building your arsenal of resources increase the confidence and protection of the teacher/school personnel involved in implementing positive approaches to disciplining their students.

True or false

1. Punishment is directed at the objectionable behavior, and the child will accept its consequence without resentment. is a response that is directed at the individual.

2. Discipline is a response that is directed at the individual. It represents a desire of one person to hurt another; and it is an expression of hostility rather than corrective love.

3. Corporal Punishment is any punishment in which physical, non physical force and other forms are/is used intended to cause some degree of pain or discomfort, however light.

4. Scolding and ridiculing the child is a form of corporal punishment.

5. Among equally important reasons, a positive approach to child discipline builds a mutually respectful relationship with students and among students