The Compassion of Lilu

“Compassion is a verb”- Thich Nhat Hanh 

The beautiful (8 year old) Kitty in the picture is Lilu. 

She is the newest addition to our family. She is now joining our two (13 year old) kitties, Normie and Nermie in our home. 

My wife has wanted us to get another cat since our 18 year old (Spike) passed away in 2019. Our two cats are brother and sister but my girl (Nermie) is a loner and doesn't want much to do with her brother (Normie). 

Normie on the other hand needs a snuggle buddy. Someone to hang out on the couch with and snuggle up with. That was Spike for the almost 10 years they lived together. 

I have been resistant to adding a new cat to our household simply because of my concern for Nermie and how she would (In my opinion) react to a new housemate. They were both inside and outside cats for many years when we lived in the Bay Area and became inside only (They have a great catio now) once we moved to a more rural location. 

Our next door neighbor, who is 89, lives by herself and was talking with us one day about wanting to get a cat. She had been feeding some outside cats for years but wanted one for a companion. She was concerned about the fact that if something happened to her (She is doing well and enjoying her life so dont worry about the story going in that direction) what would happen to the cat. 

We love animals, cats especially, and know that they make great companions and don't take as much energy to have as dogs. 

So we felt compassion for her situation and told her that if something was to happen that we would make sure her cat (if she was to get one) would be taken care of. 

Jump 3 months ahead in the story. Our neighbor had some health concerns and her son who lives about 30 minutes away thought it would be best if she was to move into a senior facility that is closer to him. 

I was in my office a week ago last Monday and my wife went over to our neighbors house to see how she was doing. We didn't know that her son had made the decision to move her already at this point. 

My wife came back less than an hour later and said, “Neighbor (for obvious reasons) is moving and she cant take her cat. We are taking her. Can you come over and help me bring her over?” 

I was shocked to say the least…

I got up and grabbed our crate that we have for our cats and headed over. We talked with our neighbor for a bit and then I picked up Lilu (which is the most adorable and gentle cat you will ever meet) and brought her Home. 

We put her in her own room and set her up with everything she needed to get cozy and start the process of introducing her to our two kitties. She had the sniffles and we set up a Vet appointment. She had a small infection so she got her shot and we have to keep everyone separated for at least 7 days so it all works out. 

Our neighbor has moved into her senior living facility and is doing well. Making friends and even though she misses Lilu she knows it was for the best. 

And Lilu is settling in and knows she has found her forever home. Her brother and sister and doing well in tolerating her for now and we know they will come to accept her into the family before too long. 

I share this story as an example of compassion. How it is a term of action. 

We could have easily said to our neighbor, “oh you want a cat, well we know it would be great to have one. Hope it works out.” and left it at that. 

Once we were approached about our neighbor leaving we could have simply tried to help them find another home for Lilu and hope for the best. With her having an infection it probably would not have ended well. 

Those are examples of what the Dalai Lama calls “sloppy sympathy”, Doing something that does not make the situation better and in fact can make the situation worse. (my definition not his). 

It is not enough to be an outside observer of someone's suffering but we must go inside their suffering to understand what is going on and to “suffer with” them and by doing that we can better support the alleviation of suffering. 

By taking these actions everyone is where they need to be getting the love and attention that is best for them. 

We have a beautiful new member of our family.