Earning the opportunity to have life-changing conversations.

Last week we had lots of conversations about conversations. Each year September and October bring many opportunities to reaffirm our committments to mental health and support for those around us.

It's a great to brush up on our skills, and to have nice frameworks for approaching chats and check-ins, so we may better help each other.

However, it's also worth reminding people, that having a framework to a good conversation is not going to makeup for a lack of care, consideration, empathy, generosity or sincerity - in all the interactions around a check-in. No amount of cupcakes will make up for a culture that consistently shows that it does not care about the people in an organisation.

While it's good to have conversation tools for the difficult chats, it's more important to be the kind of person that inspires confidence in their intentions when having any kind of conversation.

If you want to have a life-changing conversation when it matters, it's important to make decisions about how you carry yourself when it doesn't appear to matter. Building trust is the cornerstone of most impactful moments, yet unfortunately it's the part we leave out of many epiphanous stories.

When we tell the story about how a teachers wise words saved us, and focus on the one memorable moment, rather than the years of care that lead up to it, we do a disservice to the value of people who show up every day with good intentions and exceptional character.

When we talk about the day our footy coach patted us on the back and told us we'd be ok, and we're going to make it - and focus more on the words, than on the circumstances surrounding their delivery - we miss an opportunity for people to celebrate the consistency and continuity of care that gives the words resonance.

It's great to have tools to have good check-in chats. It's even better to be the kind of person that can have impactful conversations because of the care they show all the time. All the tools and frameworks in the world won't save a conversation if the person you're speaking to doubts your sincerity, intentions or good faith.

Have good conversations. Be good people. Be a good neighbour, friend, teacher, partner, customer and human. Carry yourself like someone who may earn the opportunity to one day change someones life in a positive way, and the world will be a better place for it.