Embrace temporary habits

Embrace temporary habits

When people aim to adopt new habits, the unspoken assumption is that these habits are supposed to be permanent. We want to get in shape…for good. We want to stop mindless scrolling…forever. And perhaps those are wise aspirations.

But many habits won’t be permanent for various reasons. Life changes. Schedules change. The weather changes. That is OK. When we accept that sometimes habits are most appropriate for a particular season, then we free ourselves to go all in on them, without worrying about whether we can always do them. So what if we can’t do them forever? We can do them and reap the benefits from them now.

A summer feeling

So, for instance, if you live somewhere like southeastern Pennsylvania, where it is light and lovely at 6:30 a.m. these days, you could decide to adopt a morning running habit. You could do so knowing full well that outdoor morning exercise won’t work in January when it will be dark and cold, and the roads will be icy. You have not failed when you change your routine in November. You pursued the habit when it made sense, and you stopped when it didn’t make sense.

Or maybe, thanks to the varied starting and ending times of your kids’ day camps, you get an hour with one kid each afternoon. You could give the time a special name and think of it as your new routine — even if it will only last three weeks. So what? It can be a routine for a while, and you can make the most of it.

When we accept that we can go all in on things, even if they’re not permanent, we can make wiser choices with life in general. I’m reminded of Sheryl Sandberg’s admonition to young women who’d like to have children someday that they don’t need to undercut their own careers before kids even enter the picture. Perhaps you don’t think you’ll be able to manage babies and your job simultaneously, but if those babies don’t yet exist, then this is all theoretical anyway. Lean in, she wrote, until the day you have to make a choice. If you do decide to scale back, having a bigger job on your resume might give you more options, or perhaps even the ability to take some time off if you’ve built up a financial cushion. Just because you don’t want to keep your foot on the gas forever doesn’t mean you shouldn’t put it there now.

Everything ends

We sometimes resist investing time and effort in creating routines because we see a time when the behavior won’t be feasible. I am all in favor of sustainable goals! But given that almost everything in life ends at some point, there’s no reason not to do something you truly want to do even if you won’t be able to do it forever. You can do it for a while, and in many cases, that will be long enough.

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Embracing habits that suit the current season of life allows us to fully commit and enjoy the benefits without the pressure of maintaining them forever. Thank you for this reminder that it's perfectly okay to let habits evolve with us! 💙 💛

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