Heartbreak

For a long time, there was a girl that was always on my mind.

She was a thought that I never entertained or wanted to get together with.

Because I always felt like relationships are great from a distance and mostly invading from close-up.

But I still bit the bullet.

And she took over my life.

My days were filled with watching Instagram videos, and my nights were filled with her calls.

Taylor Swift, Ariana Grande, and whoever the hell combined - were hurting my brain. Her entire demeanour was weird, she was mostly sad, and complaining.

I wasn’t allowed to like certain people, most of my opinions were shut down, and she really didn’t get along with my friends - not even for the sake of it.

Don’t get me wrong, the love was probably real, but it was very limiting.

I kept reminding myself that it was just a phase but my instincts, which are never wrong, always saw through her bullshit.

And the worst part is that I knew all this DURING THE RELATIONSHIP.

So why I did let all this happen to me?

…

For those of you who are bitter because of heartbreak, I understand how you feel.

Heartbreak could be disruptive - to say the least.

In all echelons of life, heartbreak could turn your life upside down.

But this is the same heartbreak that will also turn your life around.

I let all this happen to me only to promise myself to never let all this happen to me ever again.

Soon after the breakup, I realized how liberating life could be. 

Most times the person going through a heartbreak has two options - become bitter or better. And you know which option I’d recommend you.

For anybody who’s adamant enough to also say, “I won’t date anymore”, let me share a secret with you. 

Dating isn’t as necessary as people deem it to be!

…

To be fair, you should start dating when you’re ready to get married. (Aka - when you can be intentional and directional about it.) 

Of course, I don't mean you marry the first person you date. I also don't think that finding the right person is easy and will happen fast. 

It takes a lot of time. Yet, as I grow older, I find the whole concept of dating useless if you're not looking for someone to build a life with. 

You like someone, you are in a relationship for years and years, only to realise you have 0 alignment in vision and a future together, then you break up, and now you have to start from zero but with a heavier heart and a lot of pain and memories to get over. 

Dating isn't meant as a tool to get rid of loneliness or to find someone to just spend a few years with and "see where it goes." Dating is the process of VETTING someone as a potential husband/ wife — one to start a family with, build a life with; someone to enjoy and celebrate life with. 

…

After I broke up with this woman, I did so better in life that I surprised myself. I never thought I could ever move at such speed in life or take such strides in life in such a short period - but here we are!

As for this woman and all the women before her, I wish them all the best! Heard she got married recently, so that’s a relief!