How to step out of your comfort zone?

One of my good friends was asked to do an executive briefing, a fantastic opportunity to share her ideas but she declined. She was hesitant to step outside her comfort zone.

Life provides many opportunities to step outside of our comfort zone but seizing them can be a real challenge for many whether it’s meeting new people, going to the gym, starting a new business, having a difficult conversation or asking for a raise. We avoid these things because in one way or another because it involves different types of pain - rejection, failure, embarrassment, criticism and so on.

Comfort zone is a safe and predictable place that keeps you safe. It is mental wall or barrier that holds you from venturing out because beyond the wall is PAIN.

Also remember, on the other side of pain is GROWTH. Navigating the path requires willingness and courage.

Here is how you can move out of the comfort zone. Let’s take the example of executive briefing.

1. Lean into the fear zone - When you think of stepping outside your comfort zone, you feel anxious because the territory is new. This is the fear zone. It’s natural to feel this way because human beings have a deep desire for safety and familiarity. You may experience self-doubt, or you may find excuses of why you are unfit for the assignment. Tools to lean into fear is to build awareness and question your assumptions.
2. Move to the learning zone – Next step is to move towards the learning zone. This is where you acquire new skills. With greater awareness you now work on skill building. Tools are focus, discipline and reflective practices. One could volunteer in groups like toastmasters to hone the speaking skills.
3. Step into the growth zone - Then comes stepping into the growth zone where you apply the skills you have learnt. Understanding isn't enough to change. Phil Stutz and Barry Michels in their brilliant book, ‘The Tools’ say, “You can’t fight a strong, irrational fear with rational thinking - it’s too weak. Instead, you need a force, it’s called the force of Forward Motion.” The tool they recommend is to face the pain head on and move forward towards it. Face the fear and take on smaller and then bigger speaking opportunities.

Barry Michels says “If you’re comfortable, you’re not fully alive. Everyone thinks the comfort zone is going to make life safe, but all it really does it make life small. Taking risks like these isn't pleasant - it's more like plunging down into a dark place of fear, loneliness, confusion, and chaos. But the hero’s journey is never a linear ascent into the light. It requires us to go down and then climb back up again and again.”

The lesson here is to stretch yourself beyond what is familiar in order to step into the growth zone.

If you really want to push yourself, hire a coach!

What is something you chronically avoid doing? What are few things you can do to stretch yourself?

#comfortzone #highimpactleaders #digitalleadership