The Iron Lady

By Dina Abramson

11/11/2016

www.bestoneonline.co.il

Translation: Guy David Gazit

Ashmoret Mishal is an ultramarathon runner, at the tender age of 24, but with iron willpower. She ate up 125 miles in a single run of 38 hours, spanning across three days and realized that with the help of the human spirit, everything is achievable.

She runs a coaching firm, developed a 12 step method for leadership and success, which she teaches in personal courses, online and in a new book she has recently published.

Photo by Ohad Romano

‘After running 115 miles, in the middle of my lap, I told the friends which accompanied me; “Listen, I quit! I can’t go any further!” tells Mishal, “I sat down on the gravel and I cried. I told myself that I only have 10 more miles to go, how much more was it? But with each step I felt like knives are slashing at the bottom of my feet, and I was very sure that was it, I was about to give up. Suddenly, I found some strength, an external force that pushed me on, and I overcame those last 10 miles sprinting, shouting with joy’.

Why were you shouting? I inquire. “Because in that moment I made a choice; no more self-pity. I was done feeling bad for myself for good! And I was going to show everyone who saw me collapsed and ready to throw in the towel, that there was nothing that can withstand willpower. With that notion I completed a 125 miles ultramarathon, over three days and two nights, and I realized I have won a battle against myself.”

This sentence is in fact the epitome of Ashmoret’s vision, which is synonymous with her on her life journey as a runner, leader and trainer.

In her high-school years she already started studying to become a physical trainer at the reputable Wingate institute in Israel, and while serving her mandatory Israeli military service she studied for her bachelor’s degree in psychology, as well as spearheading leadership courses. In her successful business venture, “RAKIA – The Ultra Leadership Method”, which she founded at only 23 years of age, she combines between the trio of; psychology, leadership and Running training.

I find myself astounded by this super determined young lady, sitting across from me. The amazing burst of energy that emanates from Ashmoret enthralls anyone who meets her, within seconds she turns me into a devout fan, due to her impeccable dogma she sets for herself; resolution, willpower, goalsetting and target achieving.

Movie by Mika Orr

So, how did it all start?

‘While in high school, I returned to Israel from Chicago with my mom and sister, and all of a sudden I found myself very bored at school. In the American high schools my schedule was hectic and usually also included extracurricular sport activity in the after school hours. I had a sense of self-fulfillment in the American high-school, but in Israel I landed into this “vacuum”, and emptiness. It felt like going back in time for me. I persuaded my family and my school to let me be excused twice a week so I can go study at the Wingate institute, and that’s how I started,

When I arrived there, most of the guys in the course were around the age of forty on career retraining, and they stared at me like I was some form of rare bird, as if asking “Girl, what are you doing here?”, but I just stared back at them, “What are YOU doing here?” I want to be a trainer! People find it odd when someone knows at such a young age what they want to be when they grow up. But I’m all for it. And that’s something that I teach today in the leadership courses which I give to adolescents. “If you find something you are passionate about, don’t wait, just do!”

At the same time, my mother’s life partner, Eilon Beza, became my running coach and mentor, and within two years led me to running my very first marathon in Jerusalem of 26 miles.’

How did you get to the subject of leadership?

‘I fell in love with the leadership field during my mandatory military service in Naot Kedumim, where I was stationed and gave leadership courses, and teaching pragmatic skills for life; how do you command yourself. Also, at that time, during my military service, I already started my bachelor degree studies in psychology. After I was discharged, at 23 years old, I founded the “Rakia” company. “Rakia” actually combines all these elements in which I’ve been trained and gained experience, which is actually leadership development, starting in my military service, where I gave the leadership workshops along with the running course. The whole idea was to actually convert the empowerment I got and the tools I acquired from the running, to other people which are not necessarily sports aficionados.’

So, who exactly do you train?

‘I trained the IDF’s Division of Operations, the Israeli Air Force, and the IDF’s main running group at CyberArk high-tech company, I was the running trainer for the Israeli Police force, as well as the “Etgarim” (“Challenges”) non-profit organization, which empowers people with disabilities through sports.

Today, “Rakia” works with a variety of different companies, such as; the Fattal Hotel chain, the Israeli College of Management, and also works with groups of youth at risk, underprivileged teens, the Israeli Police, municipalities, and more.

Of all these projects, the one group which touches my heart the most is the one of empowering the kids which dropped out of school, on the fringe, and some at existential danger.

I empathize with them a lot. When I was in junior high, I too couldn’t find myself or my place. I couldn’t understand why I sat there and listened to the teacher when I much rather skip school and go downtown. I used to get “F”s all the time, it practically became my goal to “excel” in “F”s. I took it to an extremity, I wasn’t even able to focus. And that’s why I truly understand youth that cannot seem to find themselves within the educational system.’

How do you get the underprivileged kids to listen to you?

‘The courses are built in a very methodological way, when the first lecture is an expository lecture meant for inspiring. First, I play a game with them, where they have to “guess who I am”. They try to guess my name, where I’m from, etc. As stereotypical as it can get. Only afterwards, through me telling them my life story they realize, “wow!” this girl grew up without a dad, had a lot of challenges and hardship in her life, as hard as their own. That’s when they start empathizing with me, relate to me and feel more belonging.

I tell them about my teenage experience, my running challenges, how competing on track helped shape me up, I give them examples from my ultramarathon experiences, tens and hundreds of kilometers, I tell them how I thought about giving up, but didn’t let myself quit. I tell them how I found the strength not to despair, not to compromise, I tell them what it is like to run a business at such a young age, as a woman, and how many stereotypes I need to break through. They are also surrounded by stereotypes, which categorizes them.’

Let’s talk about Marathons, what was your first marathon?

‘I started running training in general with my mentor since I was 17, when I was 19 he told me; “Ashmoret, in two weeks you’re going to run the Jerusalem marathon and you’re going to complete it.” Of course I never believed I could do it, and nobody else thought so as well. Moreover, nobody thought I should even run to begin with. But he enrolled me and I managed to run the entire 26 miles, I realized a dream, it was a life changing experience which taught me that success is possible, against all belief or disbelief. It was a point in my life which contributed to a whole lot of sense of accomplishment and capability. It is that instant in which I realized that there was something else taught through the running, which nowhere else was I able to learn at such a young age; running is an amazing educational tool for developing determination, resilience, perseverance, willpower, ability awareness and development. And it is so important, especially for young people, after all, our generation is heading towards a condition where everything they want they get instantly at a click of a button. I see babies who cry the minute someone takes their smartphone away.’

What was your toughest challenge so far?

‘A 125 mile marathon, circling the Ramot-Menashe valley, over 38 hours spanning 3 days. It is the sort of test for human capability. We were 19 people who enrolled to this international competition. I remember not understanding how come only so little people registered, but after crossing the finish line, I realized why, when we were only 9 to qualify.

I won the first place out of the women runners. It is actually a 6 lap competition, so you don’t really run it straight. Every lap is of 20.5 miles.

On the last lap I couldn’t run at all. I walked. I simply couldn’t lift my legs up in the air, physically. Then they just kicked off the short 12 miles heat, so naturally I was passed from all sides by swarms of runners, hundreds of them, surrounding me.

I had two people who accompanied me, held my arms, so I probably looked like some zombie. I drank an isotonic drink and threw it up. People saw me like that, in my worst condition, it was an embarrassment, and I felt like my life was down in the dumps.

After 10 miles, in the middle of the lap, I told those who accompanied me; “Listen, I quit, I am not going on.” I sat on the gravel and cried, on the 115 miles! I asked myself, how much more really was there left, 10 miles? But every step I took felt like knives slashing at the bottom of my feet. I was sure that I was done for it.

But then my uncle, which this was his fourth competition as my accompaniment, whom is also my late dad’s father which is moving to me, because I also wanted my dad to see me succeed. He told me “Ahsmoret, you see there? There’s a resting station there, let’s walk there step by step, we’ll reach it and then we’ll see”. So I got up and looked around and I can see that the whole lap is suddenly a slanted downhill, and I remembered how I used to practice running there, so I started sprinting as fast as I ever could, while screaming. I was screaming with joy, because at that moment I made a choice; I am done with those self-pity feelings, I am done with self-pity for good!

It was an amazing experience. I crossed the finish-line and there stood waiting my family, my mom and my sister, several friends, a guy I was dating.

And the funniest thing is that at the end of the marathon I called myself an ambulance.’

She laughs.

And what are you doing these days?

Nowadays I live on the Tel-Aviv-New-York line. In Israel I have “Rakia”, my company, but I am trying to evolve and improve myself in New-York. I developed a “12 steps to success” method which my instructors and I coach. I also have an online course, a published book on amazon and soon an app for smartphones. In Israel my team of coachers give year-round courses for personal and group leadership, and organizational development through the “Rakia” method.

The whole Idea is teaching people about everything we spoke of; the willpower, perseverance, goal achievement, mental strength and development, which is taught to the people through a firsthand physical experience.

We do not lecture them on “how to cope with hardship”, we come and train them.

There is no better way to learn these pragmatic tools, other than experience and practice.’

Picture by Austin Lynch

And what have you found in New-York?

‘Ever since I went back to Israel from Chicago, in 2008, I kept missing the United-States. I love the fact that American culture reveres organization and worships the strive for excellency. It is an empowering society, which some would consider these gestures as mere manifestations of fakeness, but c’mon, the root for you, encourage you. It’s fun to live that way. I am a big fan of a culture of politeness and manners.

I feel there at home, the Jewish community in New-York is a very supportive community. I live in the SoHo, which is basically like the Diezengoff-Shenken area of Tel-Aviv. It’s the most “touristy” place in New-York, downtown with fashion, galleries and style. I’m simply happy there.’

Isn’t it hard to start from scratch?

‘When I interviewed for “The Post Game” the reporter asked me; why did you leave the success in Israel? How come you left after reaching a point of recognition and reputation and come to a country where you are unknown, and start afresh? And there is definitely something about that, undoubtedly it’s much easier to stay in your comfort zone, “Oh, well. I’m a little known here, I’m getting some traction, I might as well stay”, but I truly don’t like staying in the comfort zone, and the United States is the real test of mettle for me and my method, whether it really works on a universal scale or not.’

Where do you see yourself in a few years?

‘Of course I see myself developing more in the field, but side by side, I also want to create a company that offers business coaching for women. Did you know that only 4% of the businesses in Israel are owned by women? It’s a shame, because the Israeli women have an edge, with their IDF service background there are tougher than most. There is no reason why there shouldn’t be more women empowerment in Israel! So, naturally, I want to be a leader, I believe anyone could be their own leader and a leader for others too, and it’s definitely about time that we see more women holding powerful key positions.

I have long ago made up my mind that I have to focus on my super-goal, which is the “why”, the reason for which I do and act for everything I do. On a social level, it is actually making sports more accessible to people which are out of shape, don’t know how to obtain their goals, don’t have the highest motivation, to actually help them through exercising the method I developed.

Plus, empowering women, for me is a most important project, offering women these tools. Women, in comparison to men, their level of aspirations and self-esteem is much lower. The minute they succeed they attribute their success to external causes rather than internal ones. Men are much more competitive than women, and sport is a classic example for this topic. The sport which I use is a simulation to life, an arena for learning and experimentation.’

What has life taught you?

‘First of all, it’s the issue of setting a goal. How to obtain a goal. I learned to start small, and then little by little let it grow. Set a target for running 3 miles, and then 6 miles, every time slowly with mid-goals, breaking the super-goal into smaller goals.

It’s important on the mental plane, when people thing of a too big of a target they get stressed by it and then they give up on it. This is why the task is, first and foremost to fizzle the threat, diminish it so it will become obtainable.

There is also the subject of crisis management, how to handle and cope with difficulty; whether it’s taking deep breaths, focusing on closer objects on the way to the target, taking smaller steps instead of going to a “full steam ahead” mode, or going “zero to 100”, positive self-reinforcement, visualization of the finishing line and how everyone cheers for me as I get my medal. All these are techniques which enable success.