“It’s not the load that breaks you down. It’s the way you carry it.” — C.S. Lewis (by Itumeleng Shabangu)

Itumeleng is a young man who was born and raised in Soweto. He was very eager to leave the comfort of his mother’s womb and breathe the fresh oxygen of this little rock called earth. This is a courageous way of saying that he is a premature baby. The first few years of his life were riddled with medical complications and doctors' opinions which left his parents with a lot of doubt and fear for his life. But by the sheer miracles of faith, he lives to tell the tale.

Itumeleng grew up like any average child in Soweto. He had to learn the three basic languages of Soweto, i.e. Zulu, Setswana and English. He played in the streets with cars made of wire and snuff containers, he played soccer, and he played “hide and seek” until late at night when the street lights came on. It is also worth mentioning that he played skipping rope for cardio before skipping rope became fashionable on Instagram. All of this was managed within a routine of waking up at 5am, getting bathed by his mom, getting dressed in clean school uniform and shiny shoes, being stacked up like sardines in a Volkswagen Kombi on his way to school, performing as best as he could in his academics and making sure his homework was completed every evening before he went to bed. Education was a topic of great importance in his home which remained all the way into his adult life.

His primary school journey was adorned with many academic achievements. Every prize giving ceremony was marked by his mom screaming at the back of the auditorium when he was called on stage to receive an award. It was only in grade 8 when he realized that he might actually have a convincingly strong academic brain. He was part of the top 10 students of his grade in every term throughout his entire high school journey. Halfway in his grade 10 year, an accidental flame was sparked and this flame kept burning until his recent days.

In grade 10, Itumeleng realized that he might also have decent musical abilities. An announcement was made on the intercom during his maths class that a choir was recruiting students for auditions to join the choir. Because he had not completed his maths homework and the teacher always asked him for an answer to the homework problems, he realised he needed to sneak out of class to protect his maths reputation. He went for the choir audition and sang the South African national anthem. Little did he know that the managers of the choir would be impressed and select him to be part of the choir. The choir performed at some of the best shows in the country, including the 2010 FIFA World Cup opening ceremony with Shakira.

A few years later, Itumeleng finished matric and studied civil engineering at the University of Cape Town. He completed his undergrad and masters degrees in civil engineering while still singing for church choirs and acapella groups. When he began to interrogate the relationship between his academic brain and his musical abilities during this period of his life, he concluded that the music always relieved the stress burden of his academic pursuits. He was both the patient and the doctor at the same time.

Eventually, he began his corporate career as a bridge design engineer at one of the leading bridge design firms in the country; headquartered in Cape Town. This on its own was probably the most mentally taxing period of his life, especially because he no longer had time for extra-mural activities like choirs to keep his mind at bay. It was only until the covid-19 pandemic that he got a chance to pause and reflect on the trajectory of his life and he quickly realised that neglecting his musical element due to extreme work pressures has been quite detrimental to his mental health. He then sought out avenues to express the inner-muzo in him and divinely landed up on DJ decks. A friend of his willingly taught him how to operate the DJ equipment over three weekends and eventually asked him to play his first ever live gig at the friend’s farewell party. The nerves he experienced from the morning and throughout his performance were overwhelming, but somehow there was also an intense sense of mental healing he felt after playing that set. It was like he had finally found that inner-doctor he once knew in high school.

Itumeleng is now a more well balanced bridge designer and frequent DJ. He has had the privilege of contributing to the construction of the largest cable-stayed bridge in the country, i.e. in the Eastern Cape. He somehow managed his stress levels during this project by exploring more of his musical elements and dj’ing. The moral of this short personal story is this: I believe that we all have an inner-doctor in us who can help us navigate life in a more balanced and healthy manner in our twenties. The inner-doctor lies within those artistic or natural talent traits in us. Some of us are musicians, some painters, some bakers, some runners, etc. The hope is that we will forge a healthy relationship between the “patient and the doctor” inside of us. Acknowledging that some of our conventional or mentally taxing jobs are of necessity to our society, they should not be to the utter demise of our mental stability.

Find your inner-doctor. Your holistic well-being depends on it.

Written by: Itumeleng Shabangu (Ragoleka)

Edited by: Ms Zinhle Novazi

About the Author Itumeleng Shabangu (Ragoleka) : Itumeleng Shabangu is a well trained Bridge Engineer with a Masters in Civil Engineering. He works for a large international engineering firm. He has a genuine love for music and people. His hope is to continue exploring the reach of his skills and to perform his art at the best level that he can.

Navigating the Twenties Emma Reinecke Ms Zinhle Novazi

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