A Leader Should Be Scared of Silence

As a leader, a lot of things scare you. For me, one of those things is Silence. Especially when I ask at the end of a management update - "Any questions?" and no one asks anything. It is easy to assume that you are the smart manager and the reason for the silence is one of these a) People genuinely don't have any questions; b) People are lazy to ask any questions; or c) People are just shy to ask any questions in front of everyone.

But most of the time the reason is the fourth one - "People either have given up hope of getting any honest answer or they think there are adverse consequences for asking a controversial question."

As in this interesting article from Harvard Business Review, Leslie Perlow says -

"The social virtues of silence are reinforced by our survival instincts. Many organizations send the message—verbally or nonverbally—that falling into line is the safest way to hold on to our jobs and further our careers. The need for quiet submission is exaggerated by today’s difficult economy, where millions of people have lost their jobs and many more worry that they might."

Are you sending these messages intentionally or unintentionally to your people?

As I mentioned in my TEDTalk that it is proven in research that people who speak up, tend to have negative consequences for their career. Ask yourself, is this the belief that is making your people silent? Have you done anything to give this impression?

As a leader, you should be worried if your team is not challenging you. The risk is that you may be making mistakes in day-to-day work, which other people know but are afraid to tell you. What could be more unfortunate than hiring smart people and then building an environment where they are afraid to speak up?

Just because people don't speak up in meetings and challenge you, doesn't mean they are all fine. There are always issues that bother them and they discuss them around the water cooler or in coffee catch-ups, but not with you. They need to feel safe to ask those questions and you want to give them the right perspective. As Ed Cutmell says in his famous book Creativity Inc. -

If there is more truth in the hallways than in meetings, you have a problem.

As I have written in detail in the article - Why Is Everyone Around You So Quiet? in HumanCapital Magazine, you can do it in various ways -

1. Make Disagreement not only a right but an obligation. Tell people, they are hired to disagree and bring different perspectives to the table. It is easy to feel great when your team is in consensus and agrees with your view. But remember, you may be being blind slighted. There may be a problem that you can't see and those who can see don't feel safe telling you.
2. Thank people in front of everyone when they challenge you, ask a brave question or challenge a company policy. Remember they always had this in mind and unless they speak, you can't give a correct reason behind a specific policy or decision.
3. Stand up for your people. There will be times your people will challenge a policy or decision on which you don't have any control. Escalate it and stand up for your people. Even if you don't succeed, they would appreciate your integrity. The last thing you want to do is justify something which you don't agree with yourself.

As Steve Jobs says in this video, you can't hire and retain great people unless you run by Ideas and not hierarchy. You may not have much control over what your organization chooses to do but you do have control over what you choose to do.

So Encourage people to ask freely, when someone does - appreciate it, give honest answers and not politically correct ones.

But if none of this works and people are still usually silent, try this one - Yourself ask a controversial question that you know people are gossiping about but are afraid to ask. Then answer it. This usually breaks the ice and people go back feeling valued. If nothing else, at least with one less thing to gossip about.

Comment and let me know what you think about this topic.

You can also find me on Sangtani.com, GauravSangtani.com and Sangtani.Substack.com

[All Views in this article and anything I publish, are purely personal in nature and don't represent the view of any organization I may be associated with]