Leading with Balance: A Story of Confidence, Trust, and Mentorship

In 1999, as a young platoon leader in the 3rd Ranger Battalion, I found myself navigating a world filled with some of the most talented individuals in the military. The 75th Ranger Regiment is known for being at the tip of the spear—an organization filled with A-type personalities and some of the best. The environment inspires confidence and self-doubt, particularly for someone like me, a fresh 1st Lieutenant platoon leader surrounded by Rangers with more experience and time in “Regiment." Being selected to be a member of the 75th Ranger Regiment at that stage in life and military service was achieving a dream. Some of the best leadership lessons, mentors, and friends I made in the military were from my time in the 3rd Ranger Battalion. It formulated many of my leadership philosophies throughout my career.

After completing a training raid at McKenna MOUT (Military Operations in Urban Terrain) site at Fort Benning, GA (now known as Ft. Moore), I had one of the most pivotal conversations of my early military career. I found myself standing on the roof of one of the buildings with a non-commissioned officer (NCO) named John Brady. What transpired in that brief conversation has shaped my leadership philosophy during my time in uniform and in my corporate career.

The Conversation That Changed My Perspective

John took the opportunity to speak with me about leadership and my role in the platoon (composed of approximately 35-40 Rangers). He didn’t have to, but he chose to, and for that, I’ve always been grateful. What he shared was profound:

John acknowledged that while the NCOs and Rangers in the platoon had more experience in certain skills—skills I had also been trained in—they were experts through their time and practice. However, as an officer, I was trained in areas they were not. The challenge, he told me, was to balance the two—understanding their depth of experience while also trusting in the skills and training I brought as a platoon leader. This was not as easy for me as it would seem on the surface.

He clarified that experience doesn’t always equate to knowing more in every situation. While they had tactical and technical expertise, I brought a broader view of leadership and planning, which came with officer training. The challenge was marrying those two elements—blending their experience with my training to lead effectively. I understand this now as exactly what high–performance teams do—bring a diverse set of skills and knowledge to accomplish a common or shared goal. And the Rangers are certainly a high-performing team/organization.

Trusting Myself and Others

John emphasized the importance of confidence in my abilities and the need to trust my NCOs, but he also highlighted something crucial: accountability. He advised me not to assume that because someone had more experience in a particular skill, they knew more about the overall mission. He encouraged me to hold them accountable because, as he said, respect comes from maintaining standards, not from overlooking mistakes or hesitating to lead. How many of us have either ourselves or seen others try to lead by being friendly versus holding people accountable to standards and hoping for self-correction? The beauty is that you can hold people accountable in a nice, specific, and firm manner while maintaining respect and leading positively.

This conversation shifted my perspective. I began to see my role differently—not as someone trying to "prove" themselves, but as someone responsible for bringing my unique skill set to the team while leveraging the incredible talents of those around me.

A Lasting Relationship and Fond Memories

John and I would later work closely together on staff, and the bond we built during our time in the 3rd Ranger Battalion remained strong. Some of my fondest memories came from driving around Fort Benning together, listening to "A Great Day to Be Alive" by Travis Tritt. Those moments, both in and out of the field, solidified our mutual respect and friendship. John wasn't just a mentor in the early days—he became a trusted colleague and someone whose insights and guidance I always valued and deeply appreciated.

Leadership Lessons from the Rooftop

The lessons I learned from John that day were invaluable, not just in my military career but also in my transition to leadership in the corporate world. Here are the key leadership takeaways from that conversation:

1. Balance Experience with Expertise: As a leader, it's essential to recognize that while others may have more experience in certain areas, you bring expertise from your training and background. The goal is to balance these two elements to lead effectively.
2. Confidence in Your Abilities: Don't let others' experiences diminish your confidence. Trust the training and skills you've developed, and remember that leadership is not about knowing everything—it's about leveraging your team's strengths. In hindsight to me this touches on the idea of imposter syndrome—navigating feelings of self-doubt, especially when surrounded by highly skilled and experienced individuals.
3. Accountability Builds Respect: It is critical to hold your team accountable, even those with more experience. Accountability fosters mutual respect and ensures that everyone operates at their highest potential.
4. Trust Your Team, But Lead with Vision: As a leader, trust your team's abilities, but remember that your role is to provide a broader vision and strategy. This blend of tactical expertise and strategic leadership creates a cohesive and effective team. Trust is the cornerstone of effective leadership, and it's what allows a team to work together towards a common goal, confident in their leader's vision.
5. Mentorship Matters, Even Across Ranks: Leadership isn't only about leading those who report to you; it's about fostering growth wherever it's needed, even if it means mentoring up. Despite technically outranking him, John offered me guidance, seeing an opportunity to shape my leadership with insights that only his experience could provide. This decision wasn’t required, yet it made all the difference in how I approached my role. His mentorship taught me that impactful leaders recognize when to share their knowledge freely and support the growth of others, regardless of titles, rank, or position.

A Lesson That Endures

The lesson that day was simple but powerful: balance. As leaders, we constantly work to balance our strengths and weaknesses with those of our teams. It's not about being the most experienced or knowledgeable in every area; it's about understanding where you contribute the most and where others excel. It's about having the confidence to trust your training/experience and the humility to listen to others.

This enduring lesson continues to shape my leadership in my corporate career, inspiring me to lead with a balanced perspective.

This experience shaped how I led in the military and has carried through into my corporate career. Leadership combines skill sets, experiences, and perspectives into a cohesive and effective team. And just like that day on the rooftop, it often requires someone willing to teach, share, and mentor.

Final Thought

Leadership is not about being the most experienced person in the room. It's about balancing your skills with those of your team, holding everyone accountable, and trusting in your training and your people. Sometimes, all it takes is a conversation on a rooftop—or a drive around Fort Benning with a good friend and a great song—to shift your perspective and set the course for how you'll lead for the rest of your career. Thank you, John.