Lessons from Great Relationships - Great Questions that drive them and 20 Lessons That Win In The Long Run!

Great questions...

'Tell me about your favourite day at work this year? What made it a great day? What did you achieve? How can I help you have more of those days?' - I love this question when it comes to engaging and energising high performance people... Building great relationships.

Over the last few weeks in Australia I have had the opportunity to engage and indeed re-engage with so many of my favourite people... An opportunity to energise around great relationships... People like Dan Brown , Philip Cowley , Perry Brosnan , Matt Parker , Kirstin Daly (Chartered MCIPD, CPHR) , Sarah Wilson , Shaun Parsons , Paul White , Caeli Grange , Ben Corrigan , Matthew Franzmann , Jim Kenny , Gerard Ryan , Sandy Halpin , Julian Doyle and Robert Marinelli ... People that I would go to war for...

Why?

Because of the depth of my relationship with them.

This made me stop and think again about what builds great relationships and what are the most important lessons we can learn from them?

Great question...

'What is the one thing that I do that let's you know that I love you?'

I have always loved this question... So I started to think about the people that I know that have built Both my mother (Madonna) and my mother-in-law (Hilary) would have celebrated their 56th wedding anniversary over the weekend… My father (Bruce) died in 2018 after 50 years of marriage and my father-in-law (Peter) died in 2011 after 44 years of married life. These years provided a wealth of knowledge and insight into the power of lasting relationships. Here are some of the greatest lessons I learnt from these role-models:

 1. Commitment is Key: Staying together for represents an unwavering commitment. Through the good times and bad, commitment is the foundation of a loving relationship. 

 2. Effective Communication: Open and honest communication is vital. It helps in understanding each other's perspectives and resolving conflicts. 

 3. Patience and Understanding: There will be disagreements and challenges. Patience and understanding can help navigate these moments building real connection.

 4. Mutual Respect: Respecting each other's beliefs, values, and opinions is crucial for harmony also the ability to have different opinions yet maintain an uncommon love.

5. Adaptability: Over so many years, a lot changes. Being adaptable to life's ups and downs, personal growth, and external changes is a testament to their resilience. 

 6. Shared Goals and Values: Having common objectives and shared values can be a guiding light in a relationship - These two couples valued education, hard work and FUN. 

7. Keeping the Romance Alive: Even after many years, little gestures, dates, and special moments kept the spark alive for both of these couples.

 8. Teamwork: A partnership is about working together. Sharing responsibilities and decision-making strengthened the bond. 

 9. Forgiveness: No one is perfect. Learning to forgive and let go is an essential part of moving forward and nurturing love. I loved how both these couples modelled this ‘be quick to say thank you and be quick to say sorry’.

 10. Support System: Surrounding yourselves with supportive friends and family can act as a cushion during challenging times - Having a community of support was so important in the good times (250+) people at mum’s 80th this year and the tough times… Over 1000 people at both of the funerals of these great men.

11. Independence: While being a team is important, maintaining individual identities and pursuits is equally crucial - I love that all of these people kept alive their individual passions with a focus on community and contribution.

12. Learning and Growing Together: Embracing growth, both as individuals and as a couple, kept the relationship fresh and evolving. 

 13. Gratitude: Regularly expressing gratitude for each other's presence and the memories created together can foster positivity. 

 14. Shared Experiences: Building a reservoir of shared memories, from travels to simple everyday moments, served as a constant reminder of the journey they shared together. 

15. Maintaining Boundaries: Just as with respect, understanding and maintaining personal and relationship boundaries helped these couples to thrive.

16. Focus on What Really Matters: The ability to let go of the things that really matter and let go of the stuff that does not.

17. Laugh Together: Finding time to share the stories that made us laugh and taking the time to laugh together.

18. Be Flexible Without Compromise: Be willing to change your approach but don't compromise on what you value.

19. Have Faith: Whatever you believe in... Believe in it together and remember that with this common belief magic happens.

20. Ask better questions: How can WE...? This is such a great question and the unity that this builds is so powerful.

Every couple's journey is unique, but these lessons, learned from these amazing couples, have served as foundational principles for myself and my wonderful wife Sarah… In our 28th year together the example and legacy of our parents is something that we are both proud of as a couple. As a business leader these examples are also the basis for me to build my team. There is no such thing as a perfect marriage, husband or leader.

BUT...

These lessons transcend personal and professional life and have become the cornerstone of my purpose;

'Because MY world needs ME at MY BEST' and our 2b Limitless purpose; 'Because YOUR world needs YOU at YOUR BEST!'

Thanks mum and Hilary for the example and dad and Peter for the legacy.

#strengths #engagement #performance #transformation #coaching #training #2byb #2bapc #2bme #2blimitless #connection #experience