Love W.I.Ns

You know those moments where a friend calls out of the blue, or a loved one has something to share with you, and you feel conflicted about whether to divert your attention or stay focused on what you have going on? Here’s a perspective on it that is the priority in my growth right now.

I’m someone who really likes staying on task and getting things done. I feel proud and fulfilled at the end of the day when I kept momentum and enthusiasm from one thing to the next. This means that I often see disruptions to that rhythm as frustrating or irritating, and because of that irritation I see them as inconveniences rather than opportunities for connection.

But something I learned from Brian Johnson at Heroic is the idea of W.I.N. - What’s Important Now. When I think about the gap between who I’m being and who I’d like to be, I’ve identified that I want to be more present. Particularly, I want to give the important people in my life more of my attention when there’s an opportunity to.

This is what it looks like for me: I’m jamming out some work in the office and I get a call from my brother or a good friend, or my wife comes in with something she’s excited to share. I ask myself “What’s important now” and more often than not, the opportunity to be present with a loved one is more important than continuing to work. So I’ve been choosing to fully transition my attention out of work and invest it in my people.

Rather than labeling them as a distraction and carrying a negative and rushed energy into my interactions, I’ve been viewing it as a momentary reprioritization. This makes me more open and engaged, which adds much more quality to the moment. Not to mention I also have found that since those moments are richer, they don’t need to last as long and I actually return to my work sooner.

I’m calling these Love W.I.Ns. and when I use this new perspective of valuing the people in my life over my personal productivity, I’ve found it’s really added value to my life. But it can’t be at all costs! So the process of optimization right now is improving my awareness for these moments, and becoming more clear on what situations are best for it. 

Work in progress, right? My encouragement to you is that you try to gladly accept a disruption from a loved one as a chance to connect, and not a distraction, the next time the opportunity arises. Then you’ll have some feedback on how it works and feels for you!