Men in lighting: how to be one of the good guys

We all know lighting is the best industry in the world but even so it’s not immune from idiots: a small minority of people that create challenges for anyone else. Some of my Women in Lighting friends and I have noticed what the decent men do to help tackle sexism:

Recognise their privilege and welcome fairness

Instead of feeling threatened or denying the issues, the obvious starting point is to see and treat women as equal, realise a problem exists and want to help put it right.

Share parenting and speak up about it

Some women in lighting have children… some men do too! Families come in all shapes and size with any mixture of parents and there’s nothing wrong with turning down opportunities because you are putting your family first. Admitting this when you are a mother can be difficult because you don’t want to be written off for future opportunities. ‘The system’ can help working women by providing flexible working and better child care options, but also by expecting men to do half the parenting too. For men to say they can’t do something because of childcare, to talk about what their kids are doing at school, for parenting to be a normal part of conversation among everyone, is beneficial for all of us.

Make themselves vulnerable

Admitting weakness and difficulties has traditionally been seen as a female trait. It is great that this is changing. Society has handed men a bigger share of power overall but that doesn’t make any one man invincible. Losing the stiff upper lip, talking about mental health issues and other situations where you didn’t have the health, circumstances or skills you needed creates a culture where we can all be supportive of each other. It’s OK not to be OK.

Stand up for equality

Women aren’t holding out for a hero riding in on horseback. We can shine our own armour. But we do need the good guys to join us in standing shoulder to shoulder against the scumbags. Speak up and challenge people who treat women as lesser by their actions or words. The ‘manterrupters’ shutting women down, the ‘broppropriators’ taking women’s ideas. Women aren’t here as decorations or inconveniences. We are half of our shared world.  

Tackling sexism leads to better inclusivity and benefits the profession and society as a whole.