Messed-up Life, Never-Mind, Come-Back Stronger

I am a genius – when it comes to screwing-up my life – Again and again and then again AND that too in every aspect as well as in every respect Big-time.

You would think– that – after making mistakes after mistakes after mistakes I should be a Zen-master-wiser.

Yes, I do learn And I do recall my resolve of never to making that mistake again [in the post incident introspection period] – BUT – it lasts only till I mess up again.

If my life-pattern gels with you – then probably you will appreciate, understand and benefit from this article better than others.

In this blog you will get the light-bulb-sparks through - 21 advantages of messing up your life PLUS minimum 52 ways we can mess up our life and 45 tips on how to come out of the mess stronger and recreate the life that we want.

 AND why it is okay to mess-up time to time - for having an emotionally, physically, professionally and relationship-wise - happy, healthy and fulfilling life.

The unparalleled 3 benefits of surviving the forced or self-created mess [irrespective of whether you are a messed-up kind OR perfectly un-messed folk]

1.      Become comfortable with taking risk*

2.     Venturing into the unknown and uncertain* with more ease

3.     Approaching fearful situations – which must be faced - with lot lessor degree of unnerving feelings

21 Advantages of messing up your life

I have now become almost at peace with the following- because of having come-out through sh*t-scared, terrified and mummified situations, events, incidences - many times [it would be your value-addition too].

1.      That it is okay to end few relationships

2.     It is perfect to not to know everything

3.     It is alright to be proven wrong many-many times

4.     That I may not get Some answers ever

5.     I don't have to prove anything to anyone

6.     That in spite of major failures and setbacks and hardships – the life will go on – therefore living it the best way IS THE ONLY CHOICE I CAN MAKE

7.     That even if I have fallen in the pits – still I can get up

8.    That I can restart my life – from ZERO – anytime and every time [I have done this few times – total beginning from scratches]

9.     As long as I have added value to others [and have not hurt people deliberately] it is life worth lived => irrespective of where I end up in life financially, professionally

10. Sometimes it is very-right taking action without knowing all the answers, facts and figures

11.  That The life will create lots of misunderstanding anyway [ without my initiatives] – therefore sort outing those I can – and leaving those I can't as they are

12. That I will have many-many embarrassing moments, awkwardness, discomfort, disappointment, doubt*, guilt*, shame and disagreement – Moving on is the only way to NOT to GIVE these Emotions* Undue Powers* [read my various blogs on how to deal with them – all *marked ones have Separate Do-It-Yourself Blog in Success Unlimited Mantra's Blog Section from the Heart of Subhashis]

13. That Our biggest relationship* problems* come from our irresistible urge of fixing others – which always create many wounds, hurts* and regrets*

14. Some hurts cannot be healed – unless we go through some significant emotional/perception transforming events

15. In many cases - we just cannot make everything right again, no matter how hard we try

16. The biggest lesson I have learned that – our reality is often muddied so much so that – we see the world through tinted glasses and MAKE MAJOR MISTAKES*

17.  At the cost of few years of toil and financial mess – I learned that most of the failures that we face [anywhere in life] – can be avoided in future ONLY when we start working on ourselves

18. Learning-unlearning-relearning* - doesn't have any substitute and is as essential as breathing

19. Some of the issues/situation/events/incidents may only make sense in hindsight OR bring the clarity – so many times after we have given our 100% * and done our best – the only thing to do is Trust in time

20. Accomplishing whatever is worth your while – can only happen through a series of challenging* times, setbacks*, failures*, Big-groups, coming across a wall and being in thoroughly uncomfortable zones*

21. But if you can persist* and improvise* and find newer approaches in solving problems* - then you would get to the pinnacle like many others did before you. You need to polish, trust, and use your sixth-sense/gut-feeling/intuition to go to higher realm

52 ways - How we mess-up our life [you can add more]

1.      You feel bored* and empty and lost and alone because you never really do anything different – no challenges, no stretching ONLY Routine that too mundane one

2.     You use external things to make you feel good – like make-up, dresses, posting endless selfies, changing jobs and having multiple relationships etc.  – but nothing changes as internally the drivers are same and the correct drivers are not being exercised

3.     You have gotten used to living in your safe-bubble

4.     You don't look forward to changes* - in fact you resist changes as long as you can

5.     You have become a loner and don't have social*-professional*-support network* alone.

6.     You Blame Everyone Else for Your Problems

7.     You berate yourself Constantly

8.    You are in a Job – that does not satisfy many of your motivational drivers [ this one is – sure-shot recipe for messing yours as well as all the people who are closest to you]

9.     Not paying attention and Listening to Your Intuition

10. Never taking risks - for more read "Messed-up Your Life So What Create a Better One" in success unlimited mantra's Do-it-yourself Blog from the heart of Subhashis

45 Tips on Un-messing our life - How to ensure we Don't mess-up our Future - How to Keep Trying – even though your life is falling apart

1.      If you are unhappy being in a mess – first Slap yourself in the face - real Hard – if you hesitate to slap yourself hard – then the situation that you are facing is definitely less painful than the pain of self-slap

2.     Stop comparing your situation and suffering with others – nothing is similar

3.     Identify the feeling – Anger*, Frustrations*, Grief*, Shame*, Guilt* Jealousy*, Despair*

4.     Stop worrying about how you would look to others - let yourself feel bad and feel the feelings deeply

5.     Go ahead and cry* if you need to – it is liberating* and healthy*

6.     You can get in touch with me for a free hug within logistical possibilities* it is guaranteed – AND to be a listening ear

7.     Even through the situations could have happened not because of you but due to areas beyond your control - Identify what you could have done better, what you could have done differently, what would you that is new – in case similar thing happens

8.    If you have a trustworthy person – share your inner-turmoil with him/her

9.     If no one is there – just resolve that you will take actions to bounce-back* - - for more read "Messed-up Your Life So What Create a Better One" in success unlimited mantra's Do-it-yourself Blog from the heart of Subhashis