An 'open' letter to the CEO

Dear Tom

Previously, I lacked the guts to write to you, but now that I've handed in my resignation, I've collected the nerve to explain why I left your organization. I do realize that my resignation hardly matters in the context of this large company, and that I may be reduced to a mere statistic of the great resignation and absorbed into the larger narrative. Nonetheless, I thought I would seize this moment to express my thoughts with you so that you may, if you so choose, understand what it is like to be 'me' and the millions of other people who are reevaluating their work and lives right now. I will not be surprised if you decide to stop reading this note and discard it immediately. What you choose to do is entirely up to you; I just need to get this off my chest.

I've been with your organization for eight years. I started right out of college and have worked my way up to the position of team leader, leading a small team of three people. I consider myself an ideal employee even if I say so myself, since I work hard, frequently staying late, and on weekends, often taking work home, and even pitching for others. I never grumbled about my pay, promotions, or work hours. I, too, have never had a complaint made against me. As a minority female employee, I was glad for a job and believed that hard work would be rewarded. Meanwhile, I married, had a child, and eventually rose to the position of team leader. I've had my share of happiness and disappointments, I've made wonderful friends, and I've annoyed a few. My fourth boss in eight years is based in another city, and may not know much about what I do, and has never given me feedback other than the annual appraisal, which may lead you to conclude that I am a middle-of-the-road employee, just another headcount, nothing more, nothing less. 

However, something has happened in the past 2.5 years. Many things changed as the world dealt with the pandemic and we transitioned to working from home. Initially, I missed the structure and predictability of working from the office- there was a rhythm to it.

When we began working from home, the workload simply increased. Given the tight deadlines, my boss and his boss started daily calls to check on our performance. These calls used to start at 6:00 a.m. and ended with an evening call at 8:00 p.m. every day, Monday through Friday. We were on Zoom for 12-14 hours straight with only a 30-minute break. I was completely exhausted after the first few months, but because everyone else was going through this uncertain time, I assumed this was the new normal.

While the pressure on performance was relentless, getting what I required from my boss took weeks, if at all. I once asked my boss by email to assist me in determining what to do with certain key files. He didn't respond, so I texted him; he still won't reply. After three weeks of waiting for a response, I left him a message. I then received a cryptic email in which he stated that he had been busy with other meetings and attached an encrypted email without the password. I then requested the password from him via email and text message. There was no reaction. After another three weeks, I received an email from him chastising me for being slow to act on the files! And when I told him I had followed up with him several times, his response was that "it was clearly not enough," as if it were my responsibility.

And the George Floyd episode occurred while I was going through a terrible period at work. Try explaining what and why it happened to a 6-year-old who witnessed it all on TV! He kept questioning why cops were being so 'mean' to folks like us. While the rest of the world was going nuts, I saw a ray of hope when you, the CEO, committed to racial equality and named a Chief Diversity Officer. Unfortunately, the needle on diversity has barely moved despite nearly two years, many surveys, and focus groups. Many of us question if the whole exercise was merely pretext to quell the mounting emotions of that moment, with no real teeth or determination behind it.

Working from home ended up feeling good, whether it was due to the relentless pandemic or the terrible murder of George Floyd and others. Even though there were times when I wished for the comfort of my coworkers in the office (I missed the social contact, you see, like, going to the water cooler or something and just chatting, not about work, but about completely random issues like allergies and kids. I used to do that a lot at work). With working from home there is simply no opportunity for such a conversation. However, I was grateful to be at home because my child has a respiratory issue. My concern of my child contracting COVID-19 was always present in my mind. I was ready to resign when you originally demanded a return to office in September 2021. Given the risk of COVID, I couldn't risk bringing my unvaccinated child to a daycare while I was at work. I suffered from severe mom guilt, which you may never know about. I am not astonished by the number of women who are leaving the labor force. Our children 's well-being always occupies our thoughts. Working from home gave me some control over that situation. That dread lingers even now. My child did contract COVID a few weeks ago, and I followed. But the worry is less intense now than it once was, and I am thankful that we now have the tools and expertise to deal with it.

I believe I have done more than my fair share for the company over the previous two years. I met and even exceeded all my targets. In return, my raises have been tiny, and I initially felt it was because of COVID. Later, I discovered that the company had achieved record profits and that the upper executives had received bonuses. This year, my raise in April was only 3.0%, despite inflation being double that. I was advised that there would be a recession and possibly layoffs, so "I should be grateful I have a job for now!" But, every quarter, I hear that the company outperformed the market. So, not surprisingly, I was always wondering why am I doing worse than before, while having met all my goals?

Perhaps the final straw was when you came on the Zoom townhall two weeks ago and sternly urged us to return to the office. You hinted that if we chose to work from home, it may potentially jeopardize our jobs, and that you may consider cutting our pay or terminating us outright.

I finally gave up. I slogged for many years, I was productive during the pandemic, I kept my mouth shut despite the issues with my manager. I felt that for my peace of mind, I needed to quit. I am emboldened by the fact that the job market is hot out there and I will perhaps find the right role, the right boss, and the right compensation for my skills somewhere.

You may deduce from this long note that I was perhaps not an ideal employee, and that you were better off that I left- but I would say, at the least, I am a typical employee- one among the millions who fire up their zoom screens or surge out of the subway station every day- to make a living, but in return, hope to be treated with respect and dignity.

My sole aim from this note is not to offend you or throw anyone under the bus. It is to request you to consider really looking into what is going on in the company. Check it out for yourself. Listen, speak, and empathize. We need you as much as you need us. But treat us with humanity and respect and we will go all out for you. Where we work will not matter. Workload will not matter. We will do our best because we will feel a sense of belonging, a sense of pride and inclusion.

I wish you luck.

Yours truly.