To puppy or not to puppy?

I've been considering welcoming a new pup into the pack, but am having a number of conflicting thoughts about it. I'm sharing them so they might also offer folks things to consider if/when in a similar place...

1. Puppyhood is exhausting (when we're tending to what needs to be tended to, equipping, setting up, and developing appropriately), and - caring for 3 geriatrics, including one with dementia, flying solo - I could be setting myself up for a bit of an energetic challenge.

2. It's been evident with Hazel (our little Rottie girl in for boarding school), that her presence has brought new life and raised the energy of the pack a bit since Chip's passing. One part of me thinks my seniors may want their end of life to be peaceful, calm, and serene... while the other part of me thinks adding a new pup may bring back a little spark, new vitality, and a new sense of purpose? Could welcoming a new pup be a good thing then?

3. While I'm fully confident I could raise a pup without the influence of my older and existing crew, there's a part of me that wants their influence and imprint on a new pup. Raiyna and Todd were exceptional role models for Chip and Levi, and they really looked to them growing up. They're 14 and 16 yrs now, so am feeling a bit pressured for time if I want them to have their say, so to speak. Even with dementia, the Todd-father is still in there... I've seen it with Hazel. It still comes through.... he's still got it.

4. Raiyna is an American Indian Dog. My Lobo was an AIDog, my Tucker was an AIDog, and my Raiyna. With Cherokee and Choctaw in my blood and a longstanding passion for Native American Indian history, culture, and ways, I've always gravitated towards this particular breed and have for many years. There are many "breeders" who've branched off, renamed and tainted the bloodline, but there's still one true breeder of this particular dog I trust and will return to (who I received Raiyna from). l'll always have an AIDog, AND I'll also always have rescues. I'm deeply passionate about both.

5. I've been doing research with rescues and am finding it difficult to find a pup who hasn't already been inundated with excessive vaccinations, doused with chemical preventatives, and hasn't neutered or spayed already (or has strict "rules" about when to do so... the standard NOT being for the betterment and health of the dog, only the "no more puppies" mission of the rescue). Any pup I welcome in I will be waiting for the pup's reproductive system to be fully and entirely developed before any alterations (unless they're an older dog who was altered later in life), as I do *not* want any dog of mine to go through what Chip went through again. I'll be taking every precaution and doing all I can to prevent this. For the record, I get the mindset- there are countless dogs in need, and spaying and neutering will prevent adding to the problem (though....it hasn't yet, but I digress). BUT, with all these efforts to prevent one thing, we're actually causing, creating, and setting them up for a host of other things. Over-vaccinating, dousing with toxic chemicals to "control" fleas and ticks (something I haven't used in 12 years and will never again after taking the life of one of my dogs at age 6.5), altering, etc.... all for the sake of "prevention"; yet, it's actually a causation.

6. While I love my pack, the number of dogs I have/have had has created a lot of limitations as far as being able to travel, take time for myself/ take a vacation, conduct workshops, etc. I don't have help in this department, and it's prevented me from doing a lot of things. Do I wait? Of course, I've absolutely loved sharing my moments and days with my pack... each individual being has been an absolute gift and has enriched my life in countless ways. I'm not against having that many dogs again, but if and when I have help/ an extra set of hands/ another caring heart I trust, they trust, and we all can depend on.

(Pictured here: an old snapshot of Tucker, Raiyna and me after a long day of hiking and carrying on, and puppy pics of Raiyna, Levi, Chip, and sweet Todd when I first learned of him).