Relationships In Your Life...

I get a lot of questions about relationships from my clients. These may be relationships between a friend, partner, colleague, or business relationship. 

Whatever relationship you have, there are three components, and when you have a full understanding of these components, you’ll ultimately see your relationships improve. 

Often, the problems my clients run into are the same types of problems others have, so I wanted to help you understand these concepts so they can help you improve any relationship.  

You may want to apply these tools to a relationship you are struggling with right now or keep them in mind so that you can utilize them in the future. 

The three concepts and components of a relationship that I want to cover today are, number one, what the other person thinks of you.  Number two is what you think about the other person, and number three is what you think about yourself.

When we look at the first component of what the other person thinks of you, we can actually break this down even further by what the other person thinks of you and then what you think the other person thinks of you. 

Today, we are diving deeper into what you think the other person thinks of you.  The fact is that we really don’t know what the other person thinks of you.  They may say one thing and actually think another, so there’s no way you can truly know what the other person is thinking, and of course, they always have the opportunity to change how they think of you. 

For this reason, we’ll focus on what you think the other person thinks of you.  This, along with the second component of what you think about them and what you think about yourself, you’ll find that all three are taking into consideration what you are thinking or your mindset. 

Each of these three components can change as well.  For example, you may have positive thoughts about any of these one day, and these thoughts could easily change, could turn from positive to negative, or maybe you start judging or creating other thoughts about them on another day. 

I want you to know that this is all normal.  I also want you to know that when you know that this is all true, when the three components of your relationship with anyone are just what you think they think of you, what you think of them, and what you think of yourself, then you have complete control about the relationship you have with that other person.  The relationship you have with them exists in your thoughts and in your own mind.

I know this may be a different way of thinking about relationships, but when you understand that your relationships are created by the thoughts that you think, not the thoughts the other person thinks, or their actions or behaviors, none of this can have an effect on you until you allow it to impact one of these three components.  You have all the control over your relationships in your life. 

How you are thinking about the relationship is how you are going to feel about the relationship.  Think about a relationship you currently have.  Let’s break it down.  What do you think about this relationship?  Do you think you have a good relationship?  What do you think about the frequency you connect with this person?  How does this relationship make you feel? 

What the other person thinks about your relationship doesn’t matter because it is how you are thinking about the relationship that is causing you to feel this way about it.  It’s an interesting concept, isn’t it?  Ready to dive deeper?

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