The Secrets of A Happy Life

This week I have been reading, Gyles Brandreth's book, "The Seven Secrets of Happiness". It has been an enjoyable read with some new ideas and some useful reminders of how we can enhance our lives through incorporating a series of consistent habits into our daily routines.

He suggests the following:

One: Cultivate a Passion - To be truly happy, you must do something that you enjoy doing. Gyles provides a few examples of the passions of the late Queen Elizabeth and her love of of horses, as well as Rod Stewart and his passion of model rail tracks and engines. Singing in a choir, attending concerts, playing scrabble, golf or bowls, dancing, reading books (fact or fiction), gardening, astronomy, etc. It doesn't matter what it is...cultivate a passion.

Two: Be A Leaf On A Tree - To grow and thrive, you both have to be an individual, with a sense that you are unique and that you matter, and at the same time, you need to be connected to others: a family, a community, a company, a club. You need to be part of something bigger than yourself. Yes, a leaf of a tree is still unique and it has the advantage that it floats about - it feels free - but it is disconnected and will eventually die. Research shows that people who are best protected against certain physical disease, e.g. cancer and heart disease, are more likely to be socially involved.

Three: Break The Mirror - Break the mirror - stop looking at yourself. Stop thinking about yourself - avoid introspection. Brandreth tells of his discussions with the late Prince Philip and how he seldom wanted to discuss himself in any great detail. Prince Philip did not like talking about himself. His youngest son Prince Edward, summed it up when he said to me, "One of the best pieces of advice he gives to everybody is talk about everything else, don't talk about yourself, nobody;s interested in you." A very good point - Nobody is really interested in you. Self-awareness is good: self-regard is fatal. Break the mirror. Introspection is a killer.

Four: Don't Resist - Change is important. People who are fearful of change are rarely happy. It doesn't have to be massive change, particularly when things are going reasonably well. Uniformity is a threat to happiness, as is predictability, control and order. Don't resist change. Go with it!

Five: Audit Your Happiness - A study from 2011 reported that happy people live (on average) 14% longer than unhappy people, increasing their longevity by seven to ten years. How much of the day do you spend doing something that doesn't make you happy? Check it out and if at least half of what you do makes you unhappy, then change it. Listen to Dr Anthony Clare who has said, " Don't come into my surgery and complain. They do you know. They come and sit down and tell me nothing is right. They say they don't like their family, they don't like their work, they don't like anything. I say,"Well what are you doing about it?""

Six: Live In The Moment - Brandreth relates a story about his schooldays and how his school had a school motto, "Carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero". It translates more or less, as "Seize the day, trusting as little as possible in the future". So, stop thinking about what's coming next, stop checking the mobile, and relish what's happening now. Seize the day. For all you know it may be the only one you have.

Seven: Be Happy - And finally, if you want to be happy - you have to be happy! Act it, play the part, put on a happy face. Start thinking differently. "Choose to be optimistic" says the Dalai Lama. "It feels better". If you are feeling negative, say to yourself, "I'm going to be positive", and that, in itself, can trigger a change in how you feel.

It works! It really does!

Ref: "The Seven Secrets of Happiness" by Gyles Brandreth