Today You, Tomorrow Me.
Sreedhanya Shanmughan
Vice President and Head - Communications, DEI & CSR @ AXA Grateful that I do what I love. Storyteller. Brand Builder. Mom.
It was a blessing in disguise when a small unisex parlour opened right outside our apartment. Both for my husband and for me. He gets his regular awesome beard trim, and I go through my tweezing in there. Started by a couple who worked as hairstylists in posh parlours in the city, their dream was to employ some people, earn a good living and give their son a better life. Carefully picked girls and a boy work there as assistants. During our visits, we saw some leave, some stay, and the owner complained to us that this profession was tough because getting someone skilled was nearly impossible.
Yesterday was an eye opener for me. The girls working there were from the North East. Young, away from home for a living, the owner and his wife gave them a room to stay - and it is more like home away from home, according to the girls. But the problem begins with the local men, around this area, who come for facials and other beauty treatments.
It is a unisex parlour - but for many, the name unisex, means a lot more than that.
A girl seemed scared yesterday - she has been handed over Rs.500 as a tip for a facial. She was worried if the man would ask her to do anything more. But it was a customer after all. Her friend who was giving me a head massage told me, "these things are common Didi...they think, we are dirty girls, because we are not from here." Sometimes during head massages, men hold their hands to show where they need to massage. Sometimes, they request for chest massages during facials. Sometimes, an overwhelming tip like yesterday, leave them in the fear that they could be asked something more than the facial.
I told the girl to talk to the owner. She said, they do complain to him, and sometimes, he sits with them during head massages. But for facials which are done in a small room, there is hidden trouble. She also fears, a local could probably harass them and get the place closed down. She also fears, she would lose the monthly income sent to her family. She looked helpless, but she seemed to think this was how her life was meant to be.
What is really with the world, I think? As I was paying and getting out, I saw this man, who had gotten a complexion enhancement facial - behind his dark face, and eyes, there seemed to be an emotion that I seemed to recognise. The one that we as women see everyday on the streets - of lust, of raping women with eyes, of wondering what lies beneath our clothes.
I thought to myself, workplace, streets, buses, trains...we have no escape sister.
Today, you. Tomorrow, me.
Writer | Author-In-Progress | Design Enthusiast | Scuba Diver | Pet Parent
9yUnfortunately, this is very true and happens more often than we'd like to admit.
User-Centric Product Content: Advocacy, Advisory, and Strategy
9yMy first thought is, when are we men gonna grow up. When are we really gonna use the so-called intellect we boast about. Just because someone is from a specific geography of the world, it doesn't mean that we have the license to tag them categorically. Yes, I do agree that there would be some specific individuals from a particular ethnicity who might be indulging in certain kind of professions, which to an extent is their own personal choice. From the way I see it, customers are able to leverage those services because there are willing professionals available to provide them a perk-rate. But then, that's a different topic altogether. The point that Sreedhanya Shanmughan had made here is primarily about the sense of being or feeling vulnerable at workplace. Well, here is my thought for you sister, until a generation of mothers have taught and raised their sons with the education to treat women with equality, dignity and respect, the onus to defend and protect yourself will be on you only. In the end you have to be a "A crouching lioness under the skin of sheep". Trust me, that one very day when you give it back with salt and spice to your perpetrator, is going to be last and final instance of feeling un-safe.
Channel Marketing Specialist – Helping Brands & Sales Team meet & align for Trade Executions & Growth
9yHow can we work towards changing this ? MOST IMP QUESTION
Founder Director THITPAM (HR Consulting, Psychological Testing and Assessment services)
9ytotally agree with you Sreedhanya.