Wellness Series: Life With Work Balance

Key Points:

• In order to find life with work balance, we must collectively shape and structure our lives in a way that works for us, by defining what matters most. 
• Burnout is a state of extreme exhaustion on a physical, emotional, and cognitive level
• Burnout can affect us physically, emotionally, and cognitively. With symptoms ranging from lack of energy, poor digestion, confusion, or loss of purpose.
• Being aware of our well-being and how we are feeling on a routine basis is critical in preventing burnout.

The phrase most of us know well is work-life balance, but I have tweaked this adage to life with work balance in order to emphasize that our life is the priority. Life is the main course – work is one extremely important side dish. We must find healthy ways to include work as one aspect of a multifaceted and full life well lived. 

This is part five of my wellness series on everyday resiliency, wellness, and self-care in seasons of uncertainty adapted from my white papers. See robynehd.ca to read more topics on improving your work and life wellness.

TIME UNDER STRESS 

In the Navy, there are guidelines that prevent people from being deployed for more than 220 days or 400 days over 2 years. Why does the military have such sanctions around their personnel being away from home or in stressful environments? It is because they know that long-term stress dramatically impacts not only our mental and emotional health, it also fundamentally affects our relationships. Even trained soldiers, who are perhaps the most professionally equipped for resiliency, need to take breaks. We can only take so much for so long without reprieve! 

GET CLARITY & CREATE STRUCTURE 

Life with work balance rarely just happens. It usually takes some concerted and explicit effort to shape and structure our lives in a way that works for us. In order for us to do this, we need to get clear on what matters most. We need to know what our true priorities are. From here, we can create systems for our workday that support us in making sure our priorities are being met every day. 

To begin, ask yourself: 

• What are my non-negotiables?
• What is most important to me in my life?
• What are my values?
• If someone were to look at my life, would they be able to tell what my true priorities are?
• What kind of changes do I need to make in order to put my priorities first? 

Once we have clarity around what we most value, we can create systems that support better life with work balance. Here are some... 

BEATING BURNOUT

Christine Bays, Executive Director of ‘Unsinkable’, said; 

“The paradoxical truth about burnout is that we are not only exhausted from doing too much right now. We are exhausted from doing too little of what recharges us.” 

In our fast-paced society, burnout could have already been considered an epidemic even before the COVID-19 crisis. The additional uncertainty, anxiety, as well as the personal, interpersonal, and environmental stressors brought about by the current pandemic has put all of us at greater risk. Studies are showing that burnout is on the rise and yet, most people are not aware of what burnout actually is and therefore, do not realize when they might be experiencing it. 

WHAT IS BURNOUT? 

Burnout is a state of extreme exhaustion on a physical, emotional, and cognitive level. It is essentially too much for too long. There are a multitude of situations at work, school, and even at home that can lead to burnout. Overworking and chronic feelings of scarcity, uncertainty, or competition is a common recipe. Not being properly appreciated or acknowledged for the work that we do, and not seeing a way to improve our situation are all demoralizing working conditions that can lead to burnout. 

SIGNS OF BURNOUT

Feeling overwhelmed, bone-tired, emotionally drained, and no longer capable of doing all the things that life demands of us are all clear signs of burnout. Burnout can affect us physically – tired, lack of energy, trouble sleeping, poor digestion, and pain. It can show up as emotional or cognitive issues such as:

• Lack of motivation
• Feeling numb, confused, or defeated
• Trouble concentrating or making decisions
• Poor memory

Burnout also affects our attitudes and behaviours and can show up as self-doubt, suspicion, withdrawal from relationships or responsibilities, and loss of purpose. 

PREVENTING AND HEALING BURNOUT

Being aware of our wellbeing and how we are feeling on a routine basis is critical in preventing burn- out. Self-awareness and self-love are key. We can practice checking in with ourselves, listening to the information our bodies give us about what we need to be and stay well. Here are my top tips for life with work balance that beats burnout: 

1. Pay Yourself First – make sure to cover the basics of self-care before letting the demands of work take over your day. Movement, nourishment, joy, and rest. Focus on your connection with your whole self. Remember the 8 dimensions of wellness! 
2. Take Regular Breaks – schedule meetings as much as possible with time in between to get up from your desk, stretch, drink water, and take some deep breaths. Have blocks of time away, be unavailable, even explore being unproductive with feeling guilty! 
3. Schedule Me Time – it is so important to tend to ourselves by listening to our thoughts, feeling our feelings, and reflecting on what it is that we need. Your thoughts and feelings need a safe place to land in your mind. Cultivate time with stillness. 
4. Say ‘No’ – we cannot do all the things! Learning to say no to new projects, tasks, meetings, or favours that we don’t need to do is a critical skill and allows us more time for the first three tips above. I use language like, “I need to pass on this” versus the hard ‘No’. Also, try not to give reasons that paint you in a corner! People’s tendencies will be to try and find a solution to your ‘No’. 
5. Ask for Help – this one is the sweet spot. We don’t have to do everything on our own – we can ask for help when we need it. 

Remember, ‘It is not the load that breaks you, it is how you carry it’. (C.S. Lewis). The reality is that no one can do this work for you. You need to ensure that you are your own champion and advocate for a life that reflects your most authentic self. 

Take good care my friends,

Dr. Robyne

Interested in this topic? Please join me next week as I discuss the final part of this wellness series, Cultivating Resilient Teams in Times of Uncertainty Pt. 1.