WHY LADIES FIND IT VERY DIFFICULT TO FIND HUSBANDS NOWADAYS (PART3)

No Lady goes out to canvass for husband. It is the sole responsibility of a man to go out and look for his wife and in any case he is entitled to one wife. From the beginning apart from the order of creation, man is channeled to be the one to go out and find a suitable partner for his life. And when his wife is found, he now sets his house in order, ready for production of children as successor(s) to his name.

    But why is it difficult for today’s young men to go out and interestingly find their wives? And ironically, the same young men seem to be much interested in having casual relationship with ladies. Why? Why do you want to enter into a young lady’s body and you don’t want to live with her, why? Let me spot out some whys:

        1.        You as a guy don’t have financial power. Yes I agree that you don’t have a financial power because you are not ready to take risks, you are not ready to be adventurous, and you are not ready to commit yourself to a purposeful self and skills development. No young guy lives a life of mere wishes and become anything in life. By nature, women are to be cared for by men – that’s how God created it; if you are a Christian go and read your Bible from Genesis to Revelation, and if you are a Muslim, go and read your Quran from the beginning to the end. It’s just that things have deteriorated, things are in their state of disrepair, otherwise no matter how rich, how successful a lady is economically or financially, she is still subject to the care, to the love and to the nourishment of her husband. In return what she gives reciprocally is her body. However, modern economic and civilization pundits tends to myopically think that education has come to alter that expectation, meaning that a woman can now take all the responsibilities that are supposed to be taken by her husband

        2.       When a young man is perceived to be lacking potentials for growth in future, it becomes difficult for ladies who are good assessors of the future of a young man to consent to such a young man’s request for marital union. Let me tell you, every woman is good at discerning what the future of the young man looks like. Maybe the way you talk, your conversation about the present and future life, maybe your idea as to what you wish to become (not necessarily talking and no action), or your passion to how you package yourself, etc. Ladies do easily appraise young men in this regard and the feedback to get to themselves by themselves is either you are seen as the serious type or you are not the serious type. As everyone ought to know, and of course everyone does know, to be a woman is a huge burden and responsibility. From the pain of child bearing to being a mother of a child or children leading the children to growth and maturity is definitely a task that will require financial, material and spiritual support from the man who is just a husband.

     Apart from the scanty number of young men who are disposed to getting married at the early time of their life (unlike thousands who are due but not ready), ladies in their selection process tend to reject many unserious, unorganized and futureless young men. No woman would like to put her head under a man who will not care for the family. Becoming husband and wife is not a license to sexual access, but it is much more than that. If you marry a wife, you have signed on for the production of children, you have opened yourself up to the people of the lady as well as your own people, therefore if you don’t have money, and you cannot show or prove that you are on your way to making money in the nearest future, no young lady that knows her worth would be ready and willing to marry a directionless and futureless young man.

        3.        How do I know about all these points I have raised? For example, the numbers of young men and ladies who are looking for jobs today always have young ladies looking for the job more than the young men. During job interview, young ladies tend to be forthcoming in answering interview questions, arguing on interview points than their male counterparts. Young ladies are more eager to get job than their young men counterparts. In offices where young ladies and young men are employed, young ladies stay longer on the job and tends to be more rules and regulations compliant than their young men counterparts. Young men easily lose their jobs faster, quicker than their female counterparts. From these scenarios you could see that young men are more exposed to losing their occupational job very quickly than their female counterpart; a situation which depicts clearly those young men of today seems to be lacking the gut and grit to hold firmly together. If you cannot hold your job, if you cannot get along well with office matters, certainly you will not be able to govern a family. I will come again next time, enjoy what you read and let me hear from you.

PS: For those who sent in emails or made phone calls to ask for direction to House of God Fellowship (HGF)………..the righteous living church where people worship God with peace of mind, here below is the direction:

Enter a bus or arrive from anywhere to Ajah, move on to Abraham Adesanya roundabout, come down there or drive from there to Ogombo Town; or enter keke from Abraham Adesanya to Ogombo Town, drop at Redeemed bus stop, drive on or take okada straight to the end of the redeemed road, then ask of House of God Fellowship Church. Call this number if you need help – 08050880359.

You will be very happy to be part of this church. The church is indeed a home for the resolution of marital issues.

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Christabel Ifeanacho

Centre for Marital Affairs