Why mentors shouldn't tell entrepreneurs what to do. And why entrepreneurs shouldn't listen.

Part 1: Thoughts for mentors: Read time: approx. 3 mins and 27 seconds, ish.

I often get requests from people asking how they can become more involved with start-ups. Also, requests for advice on how to become a Non-Exec’ Director (NED). These requests are driven by a genuine desire to ‘give-back’ and a genuine enthusiasm to help founders and their ventures to succeed.

And that’s a good thing because, without exception, I’ve yet to meet a venture whose success was not directly contributed to by external NEDs and advisors, no matter how talented the founders may be. And that’s important if founders want to accelerate their business.

The reality is that whilst starting a business can be tricky - scaling-up is much more difficult than starting-up.

As a founder and business leader, when you are in “the thick of the forest, it can be especially difficult to see the wood from the trees”.

Therefore, getting a helicopter view from an external advisor / Non-Executive Director can make all the difference between success and failure in business.

That’s why I encourage entrepreneurs and Executive business leaders to seek external input by recruiting seasoned Non-Executive Directors – and to set-up expert Advisory Boards.

Business problems are democratic – they seem to affect all business equally no matter what industry they operate in.

However, there are definite points in the scale-up journey when businesses commonly get STUCK. Usually the specific challenges and obstacles I see are correlated directly to the number of employees – for example, the distinct challenges that happen when companies hit c. 30 to 35 full time employees (FTE).

Founders need to be open minded about where best to source great advice. My guidance is, look for someone who is a few months ahead of you on their entrepreneurial/leadership journey/quest. This experience and foresight is usually way more valuable than industry specific knowledge. If you are about to hire your 30th employee, find a fellow founder who recruited their 30th FTE the previous year.

But there is a big difference between sharing wisdom based on actual lived experience versus telling people what to do.

Mentors add the most value when they deliver foresight based on the real-world hard-knocks and celebrations earned through years of actually doing business.Crucially, the most powerful advice is delivered best by asking questions (sometimes the dumber the better).

As an active investor, NED and a mentor, I take great care to avoid telling people what to do because, even if you believe that your advice is right, it is vitally important for mentors to take note that:

1. You cannot guarantee that the recipient heard correctly what you said.
2. Even if they did hear what you said, you cannot influence how they interpret it.
3. Even if they heard you correctly and interpreted what you said as you intended, you have no control over the quality of their execution.
4. Even if they execute your advice well, you have no command over how the competition will react.

And so on.

That’s at least four major factors about which the advisor has no control.

It does not matter how well intended advisor recommendations may be, advisors have very little influence over outcomes.

Perhaps more important, advisors don’t suffer the consequences of their advice to the same extent as Executives either.

Aspiring mentors should give more thought and consideration to the consequences of their interventions.

What if in-fact things do not go well? What recourse does the entrepreneur have? Could / should the entrepreneur be within their rights to sue the advisor to recoup their losses?

My experience is that advisors rarely consider the potential liability of their advice. And when they do, they find the prospect of mentoring far less compelling (however well intended their recommendations may be).

In my experience the best advisors:

• impart wisdom in a way that helps founders and leaders to make informed decisions
• they provide foresight (not hindsight)
• they evidence their thoughts with relevant case-studies / past experience
• good mentors ask questions rather than offering solutions / recommendations
• they take care not to undermine the mentee’s confidence
• they make sure that the mentee is clear that decisions are theirs to make (and that they made them)

Sometimes when people tell me about their enthusiasm to support ventures, actually what I hear is a desire to tell entrepreneurs/people what to do. For people that are keen to tell other people what to do, my recommendation is, find an alternative pastime and/or profession that satisfies that need.

Remember, whether you are formally Non-Exec Director or informally a coach/mentor – the clue is in the job title: “non-executing”. It is not your job to do your mentee’s job.

Part 2: Thoughts for founders: Read time: approx. 1 min and 38 seconds, ish.

Advice is a two-way street. Not only should mentors take care in how they impart advice, but equally mentees should also consider when to listen. When seeking external advice, my recommendations to founders are:

• Note that if your venture is pioneering a new invention, a new innovation or new technology, then perhaps there is no precedent for the challenges and obstacles that you face.
• Precedent implies conformity with convention and incumbency. If your intent is to disrupt the status-quo, following the established ‘normal’ is unlikely to deliver that outcome.
• Know also that entrepreneurial success is often achieved by uncompromising people that have an unconventional and non-conformist approach to a situation or opportunity.
• Take care to leverage the advantages of a beginners’ mind.
• Know that extraordinary results often require extraordinary interventions. That following the average path is likely to only achieve average results.
• Be prepared to make mistakes and to learn from them, fast.
• Worry less about making the right choices and decisions. Worry more about how to recover faster from the decisions that you make.
• Avoid relying on hope. Intervention is way more reliable than wishful thinking. 
• Listen to external advisors that help improve the quality of your decision making when determining what your best shot is.
• Resist the temptation to delegate difficult decisions – advisors should not decide for you.
• Where possible use a ‘no regrets strategy’ – envision yourself in the future looking back on the decision you are making now and work out which option represents the least regret (not necessarily the least risk) – and ask your advisors / mentors / Non-Executive Directors for their perspective on that.

NB. Please note: Being ‘uncompromising’ and ‘unconventional’ should not be confused as permission to behave like an asshole.

When considering who you want to recruit as a mentor – my recommendation is: aim high. Don’t be frightened to reach-out to super-stars – what’s the worst that could happen – you never know, you might be pleasantly surprised by what they suggest.

My final thought is: think of business mentoring like food - like all forms of nourishment, metaphorically speaking:

• take care to eat a balanced diet;
• don’t over-eat;
• check the ‘best-before’ date – make sure it’s not past it’s ‘sell-by-date’ – if in-doubt, rely on the sniff test (avoid anything that smells off);
• eat at sensible times of the day;
• always read the label (avoid artificial ingredients – and check the provenance):
• consume all things in moderation;
• mind your manners (be grateful, even if you don’t like the taste);
• don’t talk whilst eating;
• and consume as much variety and diversity as possible;
• go to bed hungry.

Remember, some foods are more richly nutritious than others. Choose your mentors wisely – good input can make all the difference.

Part 3: Thoughts for both mentors and mentees: Read time: approx. 1 min and 21 seconds, ish.

One of my mantras is: Great leaders don’t tell people what to do. And so it may sound contradictory, but advisors should not duck answering straight questions. But they should take care to answer direct questions with relevant examples based on experience that demonstrate the context, the consequences, and the likely outcomes – which is very different to answering with a recommendation “What you need to do is …”. As an advisor your job is to enrich decision making, not to decide on your mentee’s behalf.

Both mentors and mentees BEWARE: Advisors have the luxury of the ‘helicopter view’. It is very easy for both mentor and mentee to mistakenly confuse the benefit of that elevated perspective for actual genius. In the words of Liam Black, it is always worth remembering: “You are not the Messiah”. I have seen first-hand the negative consequence of when that goes wrong. Supposed genius can create dependency, intoxication and addiction that is stronger than any drug and just as toxic and destructive.

If you are an entrepreneur and/or leader I encourage you to find good mentors, advisors, and Non-Executive Directors – they have the potential to accelerate your progress exponentially.

And so, if your career has gifted you the benefit of functional-expertise and experience in any of the core business disciplines, such as finance, marketing, operations, legal, HR, sales – don’t hesitate to make that talent available to founders in need of support to help them succeed. Just don’t tell them what to do.

If you are a founder and/or CEO struggling to scale-up your venture and perhaps feel STUCK, don’t hesitate to reach out to seasoned professionals who are experts in the areas which are challenging you most. Just don’t leap to act on what the tell you. Leverage your mentor’s talent and experience to inform your decisions and determine the best shots.

If you find yourself in a room where the narrative sounds like: “What you need to do is …” either find a different narrator, or better still, find a different room.