World Mental Health Day - Our Meaning

October 10th was World Mental Health Day—a day that holds profound meaning for me and my family. It’s a global reminder of the importance of total well-being, but for us, it’s also a personal day of reflection and remembrance. This day marks three years since Donna, my wife, best friend, and the mother of our four children, passed away due to complications from mental illness.

Mental illness is often misunderstood, and those who struggle with it may carry silent battles that others never see. Donna was one of those brave fighters. She was vibrant, loving, and immensely talented—an award-winning writer, dedicated teacher, and talented athlete. Despite her struggles, she was an incredible mother and partner, giving everything she had to her family. Yet, for many years, mental illness cast a dark shadow over her mind, making every day a battle within herself.

Few could see it, and she did her best to keep it that way. The challenges she faced intensified during the pandemic. When COVID restrictions were at their height, professional support became scarce, and travel restrictions made it impossible for close friends and family to be there when she needed them most. The isolation brought on by the pandemic made her struggle even more overwhelming, and the support systems we relied on were out of reach. By the end, for my kids and me, there were no family members or grandparents allowed to attend the funeral due to COVID restrictions—a heartbreaking storm.

The stigma around mental health has an enormous impact on treatment. Mental health has the highest rate of people not seeking treatment or discontinuing treatment of any illness. Many people mistakenly still believe this is merely a matter of “make a better choice,” as if it’s simply about “cheering up,” “thinking positive,” or “leaving that job.” But mental health is not just a state of mind or circumstance; it is brain health. It touches so many families. Watching someone you love struggle with mental illness and make unhelpful decisions is traumatic. We did everything we could to love, cuddle, and support her.

I write this on behalf of my kids and me to honour their mom and the strength she showed in facing her battles. We also honour everyone who fights battles they can’t always understand or explain, all while trying hard to keep it unseen. Losing someone to mental illness is one of the deepest heartbreaks; it combines loss, isolation, opinions, and many unanswered “what-ifs” and “if only more could have been done.”

As a family, as we once again pass World Mental Health Day, we continue to put our efforts into moving beyond awareness and into meaningful action. One at a time, we build a world where mental health care is as accessible, effective, and normalized as physical health care, a world where stigma no longer holds people back from reaching out for help.

Donna was a beautiful soul, and her health journey was quiet for so many years. Stigma prevented her from sharing this with close friends, talking to mental health support, or exploring her own thinking; she preferred to keep moving. And she was effective at that. But it was not enough. A stuck brain cannot get unstuck on its own. Professional support is often needed for a reset. Then, the spark can reappear, along with a lighter, brighter path.

We remember Donna for the love she gave, the life she lived, and the lessons she continues to teach us. She would be proud of our kids; they acknowledge their grief but respond with a light step, a kind heart, and a love of life. No matter what happens in life, our choice of response can be empowering. We honour every person facing this battle; they deserve to be seen, heard, and supported so they can find the lightest, brightest path ahead. They deserve it, and so do the family and friends they love.

Go well,

Richard

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