Would Kenya survive if we eradicated corruption?

A couple of years ago, I was driving down to Industrial Area for a meeting with a prospective client to negotiate a deal worth Kes. 20M which we had been pursuing for months.

Since I had left for the meeting a little late, ungekua na haraka unge toka jana, I decided to overlap at a point where the traffic was moving slowly as clearly my appointment was more important than that of those ahead of me.

When I got to the offending bottle neck I met a very competent traffic police officer who politely asked me to park my car on the side as he continued to direct traffic.

Engaging a consulting officer

After about 15 minutes, he walked over to the passenger side of my car, removed his hat, opened the door, sat down and then asked me "unajua makosa yako" for which I responded in the affirmative.

He then proceeded to narrat to me the process that stood ahead for me which was;

1. I wait there until his shift is over which was in about 3 hours time
2. He would then take me to the Embakassy Police Station to be booked
3. After which if I could raise the cash bail of between 5k and 20k then I would be allowed to leave with my vehicles, alternatively I would leave the car there and come for it after court appearance assuming I was not jailed.
4. I would then be required to show up to court in Makadara the following day to respond to the charges, after which I would either be fined or jailed, if the latter I could go back to my extremely busy and productive life.

Remember, I was on my way to a very important date, just like the White Rabbit from Alice in Wonderland, so I asked the officer what was his consultation fee to handle the steps for me as I went on with my busy life,

His response was 5k after which we negotiated and he decided not to charge me based on scale but instead he would use the schedule on negotiated fees.

I paid the consulting officer his retainer of 2k and agreed to catch up later for the settlement of the other charges after which he walked out of my car, put on his crown and went off to service the public.

Soon after settling with the consultant I went off and was fortunately able to made it in time to close the Kes 20M deal thus the economy got a higher return than if I was dragged through the so called legal process.

Being a Good Citizen

A few months later I was yet again in a similar rush to support the economy and yet again I found myself in a similar situation as before but this time around I decided that I will be a good citizen and pay fully for my indiscretion.

So when the officer of the law came round to the passenger side I acknowledged my crime but refused to entertain any ideas of him providing me with consulting services so he took my driving license and directed me to make my way to the police station.

I dutifully drove to the station and waited for him to arrive after he had finished his BD activities. He finally arrived about three hours later and proceeded to book me after which he asked if I wanted a cash bail for which I responded in the affirmative.

The amount for the cash bail was Kes 7k which I dutifully paid after which I was issued with a receipt as well as my court summons for 7 am the following day at the Kibra Law Courts.

Off I went, on the way I cancelled my morning appointments for the following morning as I was sure that the court issues would not last more than a few hours after which I could return to my busy schedule of building the nation.

My Day in Court

So the following day I made my way to the Kibra Law Courts where I proceeded to present myself to the court clerk, who took my summons then asked me to sit on a long bench next to him as he processed other traffic offenders like myself.

After he was done we were handed over to another police officer who herded us our and to the court cells where to await for our cases to be called by the Almighty Magistrate.

At around 10 am I finally found myself in the court sitted in what I believe is referred to as the docket . We were then called by name in groups and then the common charges were read to us.

One would have thought that we were all driving the same car as all the three charges were identical but that is a matter for another rant.

As I had heard those who were processed before my group, we all responded in unison YES to the charges even though I had only committed one of the three charges but time spent in the cells got me some great insight from the regulars.

Since we had accepted our crimes the magistrate proceeded to read us our sentence, Kes 3.5k or 3 months in jail all for overlapping after which we were given our fine demand notes by the court clerk then sent off back to the cells.

Mabusu hawezi jilipia fine

As I sat in the cells I would hear peoples names being called after which they walked off and never returned, so like the newbie I was I sat there waiting to be called.

In the meantime I made friends with some two young men who were in for attempted murder, which made no sense why they would be kept in the same cell as innocent me who had just overlapped due to being in a rush to serve the nation.

As I still had my mobile phone with me, they asked me if they could make a few calls to tell their relatives about where they were, they then returned the phone to me and we chatted on as I waited for my name to be called.

After 3 hours or so and realising that the cell was emptying my Kenyanese erupted and I walked over to the guard to ask when my name was likely to be called. He told me that it would only be called once my fine had been paid, so innocent me asked if I can go and pay my fine for which his response was "mabusu hawezi jilipia fine" so he suggested to me that I find someone to come and pay the fine on my behalf.

So I went back and started calling my contacts to see who was in the vicinity but as usual everyone was for some strange reason miles away from my location. After a while the same guard came to the cell door and shouted that those who will not have paid their fines in the next hour will be moved to the Remand Prison in Industrial Area.

Now I was in panic mode, so I called the guard and asked if he could go and pay my fine for me, he asked me if I had a cash bail and I said yes, he then asked how much was it for which I responded Kes 7k. He then asked how much had I been fined and I told him Kes. 3.5K.

He then asked me for the cash bail receipt as well as the fine sheet and off he went, 15 minutes later he returned with my stamped fine receipt and my release documents after which he opened the door and courteously asked me to leave.

In my continued ignorance I asked for my change since my cash bail was 7k and my fine was 3.5k so there should be change of Kes 3.5k, his response, kwani tunajuana?

At which point I dashed to the court car park, got into my car and drove off home as by the time I was released the working day was over and as I passed through the gate I swore to never commit a traffic offence ever again.

The lesson learned

Years ago I worked for a leading consultancy firm and based on ones pay grade you were assigned what was called a charge out rate, in 1993 mine was Kes 3,500/- per hour.

Now based on that rate the time I spent resolving my traffic offence would have cost my employer one and a half days which would be Kes 42,000/- of which the government would have made about Kes 10,000/- yet by taking me through that frustrating journey they only made 3,500/- which was to cover the cost of a couple of police officers, a court clerk, a magistrate and a cell guard.

The cell guard on the other end ended up making the equivalent for offering me 15 minutes of his consulting time meaning his charge out was higher than even mine.

So you ask, why is it that the police officer could not have booked me at the scene of the infringement, I do not want to call it a crime, as used to be the case in the 1970s and part of the 1980s?

I will leave you to ponder that question for yourself and don't forget I am in Kenya the most celebrated IT savvy nation in the universe north of the Milky Way.

If I was charged on the spot, pleaded guilty and then paid my fine after which I would have gone about my day serving the nation and contributing greatly to the state coffers.

Is corruption the oil that keeps the nation running?

In the first instance, the corrupt officer oiled the process for me to pay for my infringement allowing me to get back to more productive activities.

If we all took the direction I took in the second instance then the courts and police stations would be overwhelmed and the economy would likely grind to a halt.

I am not advocating for corruption but corruption seems to be an inherent feature of our economy as opposed to being a flaw as is propagated by our former colonisers who are also not immune from the same as it seems to be etched into the DNA of this so called modern way of living.

We can reduce corruption while keeping the economy moving by leveraging technology but for now that is a pipe dream especially since too many of us are dependent on the proceeds of corruption.

Let me rest my case here and let you make your own conclusions.