Are You Asking Yourself the Right Questions?

As human beings, we’re constantly asking ourselves questions throughout the day.  “What did I do with my phone?”  “When will this project be done?”  “Did I remember to pack my son’s lunch for school?” :-)

Sometimes the questions we internally ask ourselves are valuable, but oftentimes they can cause significant harm. “Why am I so unlucky?” is an example of a question that could have a negative ripple effect on our lives. Since our minds try to answer every question we ask ourselves, we could be feeding our brain destructive answers that create a negative identity. 

If we truly want to live with joy and purpose, then we have to start asking ourselves better questions. This is one of the aspects of my life that I’ve worked really hard on in 2019 and it’s starting to pay off big time.  I’m still working on the “question journey,” so I don’t have all the answers, but here is what I’ve done to try to get my internal questions under control. 

Ask yourself effective questions:  

1. Ask the right questions in the morning. Every morning when I wake up, I open my journal and ask myself what I’m grateful for. I will force myself to write at least 3 things down. This exercise starts my day our right, since I’m focused on my blessings vs. my challenges.  Consider these prompts: “what gives me the most joy?”  “what do I have that most people don’t?”  “Why was I blessed with such an amazing spouse?”  “Why do so many opportunities come my way?” I’m only asking positive questions during this exercise and my mind answers with positive energy. I’ve found that this is a really good way to start my day.  
2. Only ask questions that support your goals.  My wife recently bought me a Fitbit, since I’ve been wanting one for awhile and she found a great deal. I’ve found the device to be very motivational, since it tracks steps and heart rate.  Now I’ve made a game out of getting healthier, since I like to see if I can continually get above my daily goals. Since I’m trying to use the band as a way to lose weight, I’ve focused on positive weight loss questions. “What can I eat for lunch that will still taste good, but be under a certain amount of calories?” “Instead of eating ice cream, can I eat some type of frozen berries with a tiny bit of yogurt?” “Why don’t I park at the end of the parking lot and walk in, since I’m trying to boost my daily step numbers?” I’ve found that continually asking myself questions that support my 10 pound weight loss goal is very beneficial.   
3. Pay attention to yourself. Make sure to constantly be making mental notes throughout the day of what kind of questions you’re asking yourself. It’s best to literally correct yourself on the spot when a question pops in your head that could negatively impact your goals. If a negative thought does come up, make sure to correct it with a positive question to ask yourself. For instance, instead of asking yourself, “why can’t I ever find the time to do that project?” Try asking, “If I give up TV shows this week, can I finish that project I know I need to do?” I know it sounds simple, but you might be amazed as to how changing the questions you ask yourself will empower you to achieve more than you ever thought possible. 

This is simple, but it’s not exactly easy.  Don’t confuse simple with easy. This will stretch you and it will take time to form the habit of asking the right questions.  Although, you will quickly realize that questions are one of the most powerful elements of your thoughts and when used properly can do a ton of good. If you learn how to harness the power of asking the right questions to yourself, your life will improve in many, many ways.