Are You a Leader or an Ego-Driven Wannabe?

Leadership can be a tricky thing to define, and that’s because it’s different from person to person. Are you a leader? Do you have what it takes to be effective as a leader? To answer these questions, we first need to understand the difference between leadership and ego-driven wannabe leadership.

Leadership traits

To be an effective leader, you must be able to put your ego aside and lead from a place of service. This means being able to put your team's needs first, being transparent and honest, and having the ability to listen to and take feedback. Leaders also need to be able to take responsibility for their actions and inspire others to do their best work. It takes courage to show vulnerability, which is why so many leaders don't want to be seen that way. However, it is important to not let pride get in the way of doing what is right. Too often, I have seen leaders duck and cover, throw their people under the bus, throw their positional weight around, and instead of leading from a place of service, lead from a place of ego when things get rough. While it might feel like you are on top of the world, this behaviour will eventually come back to bite you. Instead, become an example by serving those who look up to you and know that greatness doesn't come with a title but rather comes from humble leadership. Remember, no one has to follow you if they don't want to. As a leader, it is imperative that you hold yourself accountable as well as your team accountable for making decisions in alignment with your organisational values. When we make good decisions, we experience personal growth. When we make bad decisions, it's necessary to reflect on our own behaviours and how we can improve them going forward. We must also be willing to challenge ourselves by asking questions such as, "What am I not seeing?" How am I contributing to the problem? And most importantly, once we've identified where our blind spots are, we must learn from them and do better next time. If you're wondering how great leaders should behave, ask yourself: Is there room for improvement in my life?

Ego-driven wannabes

Ego-driven wannabes will try to cover up their mistakes, point the finger at others, and make decisions based on what makes them look good rather than what's best for the team. When the going gets tough, they're nowhere to be found. True leaders are those who serve their team and take responsibility for their mistakes. They don't let their egos stop them from being humble, compassionate, and asking for input from others. Tough times call for strong leaders, so if we've ever made it through tough times before, it'll happen again. Ego-driven wannabes only think about themselves, and these individuals instead care about what their loved ones think. They quickly shift the blame to others, never take responsibility for their mistakes, and only care about how they look. Far too often, I have seen leaders defer, derail, and let their ego guide them in tough times, instead of just doing the hard work. To a true leader, that's not leadership—it's arrogant behaviour from an aspiring would-be.

The cost of leadership failure

Leadership failures can have costly consequences. For example, when a leader fails to take responsibility for their actions, it can breed resentment and distrust among their team. This can lead to low morale and high turnover rates, which can in turn negatively impact the bottom line. In short, leadership failures can be expensive, both in terms of money and in terms of the damage they can do to an organisation's reputation. In addition, if you are failing as a leader and not taking responsibility for your own mistakes, you are likely passing on that legacy to your people. If you want better results in your leadership role, consider how important ownership is. As John Maxwell says, ownership of our problems does not mean we blame ourselves but that we take full responsibility. "Owning our problems" means we assume responsibility for doing something about them. It means acknowledging the truth, apologising when appropriate, making amends where possible, correcting what needs to be corrected, fixing what should be fixed, and learning from what has happened so that we can avoid similar situations in the future. Leaders who refuse to take responsibility often leave behind toxic organisations with employees who feel undervalued and disenfranchised. Remember this old adage: The buck stops here. Responsibility begets accountability, which begets achievement. Are you ready to become a true leader who takes responsibility for your success or failure?

Why good leaders fall down

No one is perfect, and even the best leaders make mistakes. But what separates the good from the great is how they handle those mistakes. A good leader will own up to their mistakes, learn from them, and do better next time. An ego-driven wannabe will try to cover up their mistakes, point the finger at someone else, and generally make things worse. They can't stand being wrong in any way, so they double down on making sure everyone knows it was someone else's fault. It's not about fixing the problem; it's about saving face. If you're like this, you are never going to be successful because your focus isn't on your people and achieving results--it's on yourself. If you want to get better as a leader if you want to lead with humility instead of ego, start by recognising that there are two types of mistakes: ones that can be fixed and ones that cannot. Own up to the ones that cannot be fixed--you may feel embarrassed for a moment but it's worth it because then your team won't have to go through the same experience again. Own up to the ones that can be fixed--don't let them happen again. Take responsibility for the problems that happen on your watch and don't shift blame elsewhere.

How to be an effective leader even in difficult times

An effective leader is someone who can remain calm and level-headed in difficult times and who is more interested in finding solutions than placing blame. Leaders are also good communicators and work to build trust with their teams. Here are some tips for being an effective leader Acknowledge that there are challenges, and don't make excuses. Be transparent about the problem and what you know as the solution. Get people involved so they feel like they have a stake in it too - this will motivate them to make it happen! And if something doesn't go according to plan, accept responsibility, but then do everything you can to find the root cause of the problem so it doesn't happen again. If things get really bad, make sure your people feel safe enough to talk to you about any issues without fear of retribution. Finally, when things start turning around, be sure to thank everyone for their hard work and dedication.

Can you change your position on this scale?

The difference between leaders and those who simply want to be in charge is that leaders are willing to serve. They put their egos aside and do what's best for the team, even if it means making themselves look bad. Leaders are also humble, which allows them to listen to others and learn from their mistakes. If you're more concerned with your own image than the welfare of your team, it's time to take a step back and reassess your priorities. Remember, as a leader you don't have to be perfect; all you need to do is care about your people and not yourself. 

A good leader puts his people first by focusing on serving instead of being served. I've seen many executives duck and cover when things get tough, throw their people under the bus when they are pushed out of their comfort zone, and throw around positional weight when they should be listening intently to gain understanding. When our ego runs our decisions, we risk losing everything we've worked so hard to build. As leaders, we must always remember the needs of our teams before ours because what kind of leader would hurt those they work with just so they can feel better about themselves?

Key takeaways

The difference between a leader and an ego-driven wannabe is that leaders lead from a place of service while wannabes lead from a place of ego. Leaders are also willing to take responsibility for their actions and the actions of their team, while wannabes are quick to point the finger and pass the blame. Leaders inspire others to be their best, while wannabes use fear and intimidation to get what they want. Leaders focus on serving and caring for people; wannabes focus on themselves. Great leaders set out clear expectations, empower those around them, and hold themselves accountable when things go wrong; wannabes try to do everything themselves and don't trust anyone else with anything. The best example I can think of is how many times have you seen executives duck and cover, throw their people under the bus, and throw their positional weight around, instead of leading from a place of service. What this means in real life is someone getting blamed for something they had no control over but having someone who actually did something wrong gets off scot-free. In short, great leaders help their teams succeed not just by setting high standards but by guiding them to achieve these standards to ensure success.