A 12-Year Journey of Courage

As I sat in reflection this morning, I realized I’ve been in business for 12 years.

Some days it feels like a lifetime and some days it has gone by in a blink of an eye. And every day, I don’t give myself credit for what I’ve created. The Enneagram 7 in me sees the next thing, and the next thing, and the thing I haven’t done yet.  Some days I can acknowledge the legacy of courage and leadership, but most days I see all the things I haven’t created and where I’ve let shame, doubt, and fear hold me back.

I left my corporate career in July of 2012 with starry eyes and visions of grandeur. The ultimate goal and vision of success was to be on stage, speaking in front of thousands of people, get standing ovations, and sell out every last book at the back table. But there was such a gap between where I was and where I saw myself. I had no plan. No clients. No prospects. No signature speech. 

I hadn’t done anything worthy of talking about.

Someone told me once that the only people who get on big stages were those who had something tragic happen in their lives or people who had done something amazing. I don’t know about you but I’d pick an achievement over a traumatic event any day so my ‘something amazing’ was riding a motorcycle from New York City to San Francisco in 2015. I got to present at a few International Motorcycle Shows across the country but this accomplishment didn’t land me on any ‘big’ stages. I digress...

For the next few years, I spent my time coaching professionals through strategy, developing and delivering leadership programs, and hosting large leadership conferences with 500 people in the room. (I had to just pause for a moment to let that last sentence sink in for me. Wow. I did that? I did that!)

But most days I felt like I was throwing sh*t against the wall to see if it would stick. I kind of lived in the philosophy of ‘what-do-you-need-and-I’ll-build-it-for-you-even-though-I-really-have-no-idea-what-I’m-doing’. Many, many times I wanted to quit and get a ‘real job.’ I was tired of relying on myself and I just didn’t have the hustle in me anymore. I felt like a lone ranger... a wanderer... not really belonging anywhere or to anyone.

I still feel that way a lot.

Belonging in my business started when I attempted a moonshot and was accepted as a facilitator of Brené Brown’s work in 2018. Layering Brené’s courage work with understanding (and practicing) in-depth transformational coaching, really cracked open a whole new world for me. I started to move from a place of answers, ego, and strategy, to a place of questions, emotions, and excavating what's deep down inside.

Holy crap this felt really scary. Going from the armored up ‘Queen B’ to a touchy-feely, woo, awakened woman? (OK... maybe that’s an extreme description.) But it also felt like a missing piece.

Understanding that much of my life was driven by the unrelenting messages of shame (I learned that thanks to Brené), drove me to study the ooey-gooey parts of who we are. Vulnerability. Emotions. Thoughts. Fears. Judgment. Perfectionism. People-pleasing. Values. Posturing. Armor. Stories. Empathy. Self-compassion. Inner critic. Spirituality. Beliefs. Worthiness.

I started to work through all of these things in my life. I could see where I got in my own way and painstakingly cleared the path. (It's an ongoing clearing...) I noticed this in others too and started offering spaces where people could lean into the uncomfortable and excavate the truth to clear their path. I created Collectives, women’s retreats, and coaching programs aimed at discovering who we are at our bravest selves. Teaching people how to be courageous leaders through Dare to Lead brought it all together.  

I traded in my dream of delivering the perfect speech in rooms of thousands to having contemplative dialogue with people over coffee. The large stage became an intimate setting where the real work of bravery could happen. Not in big conference centers but in retreat living rooms and smaller venues.

The letting go was hard and I’m still mourning the loss of that first dream. But I’m hitting my stride and feel like I’ve finally found my harmonic gait. There is more alignment and congruency in the entirety of my life. I know what my strengths are. I know the work that’s in my bones. I know what I've been put here to do. And I’ve given myself permission to say no to what doesn’t fit. (Which is also really scary when the scarcity monster creeps in.)

But I fear my harmonic gait will be interrupted as I’ll experience another shift in my business in 2025. You may have heard the news that Brené sold her Dare to Lead IP and entered into a partnership for this work to be delivered in a different way. As of now, it’s unclear what’s in store for Dare to Lead and my part/authority in it going forward. It scares me a bit because DTL has been the foundation of my business the last 6 years and the catalyst that brought me to where I am today.

I’m choosing to stay curious, listen to my inner wisdom, and let the encouragement of my mentors, friends, and DTL alumni be my guiding light. They remind me of the impact I’ve had on their lives and speak truth into my heart where I let doubt creep in.

I share all of this to honor my own journey of courage these last 12 years and the people that have traveled with me.

My business looks nothing like I thought it would. Smaller... in a way. Less glory. Less ego. Less being known. Rather... more authenticity. More True Self. More Known. My hope is that the ripple effect will reach further than I may ever know. I’m learning to unhook from the outcome and accept not knowing my full impact as my pathway... to keep a loose hold and trust the road I’m on.

I am grateful for you and how you’ve joined me in navigating these last 12 years. Here’s to the next 12 years of helping others remember their worthiness and dare to be brave with their lives so that they can do the work they’ve Divinely been put here to do!

To living bravely ~

Lisa