The Alarming Reality of Violence and Discipline in Our Society

By Prof. Lynn Davies | 3 min read

It’s OK for a man to beat his wife?

🆘 A UNDP report last week revealed that a staggering 25% of people across the world think it is justifiable for a man to beat his wife. As the report points out, all biased gender social norms are potentially harmful, but perhaps none has a more direct impact on women’s agency and well-being than those leading to violence against women and girls. As well as exposing wife beating, the report revealed that a similar share (26%) of women over the age of 15 had experienced intimate partner violence.

‼️ While the UNDP report was concerned about the plight of women globally, nearer to home, we have Andrew Tate. The impact of his misogyny over the years is now well documented. What global reports cannot always tackle is how the acceptability of violence against women is spread through social media and influencers such as Andrew Tate.  

🛑Young men are drawn to his views, his extreme and controlling version of masculinity and his violence. He has posted videos showing him beating up a girl, contributing to the mass of pornographic material to be found online, much of it violent. In our ConnectFutures workshops with teachers on fake news and disinformation, we find teachers highly concerned about messages by influencers such as Tate and appreciating discussion amongst themselves and with us on how to tackle this and the male control, which is at the heart of misogyny.  

🛑As UNDP point out, even social norms not explicitly linked to violence can result in violence against women and girls. For example, social norms that support men’s social or physical control over women (including over their assets) can increase the risk of intimate partner violence or sexual abuse.

And can you beat your children? 

🚸The UNDP data was taken from the World Values Survey 2017-2022, which also asks about parents beating children. Great Britain/UK was not included in the question about wife beating for some reason, but it was in the question on whether it was justifiable for parents to hit their children.  Here, a large majority (79.8%) did say it was never justifiable;  but this leaves roughly 20% who think it can be justified sometimes or always. With a population of about 69 million, that’s about 14 million people in the UK who will think it acceptable to hit their children. That’s an awful lot of people.  

‼️The current law in England does not help challenge this, with its get-out clause of ‘reasonable punishment’. Nor does the language of ‘smacking’. As recently as April this year, the UK government continued to reject calls to ban physical punishment of children in England, claiming they are already protected by law.  But asNSPCC chief executive Sir Peter Wanless said: "It cannot be right that in this country it is illegal to hit an adult, but equal protection is not given to a child’.

🛑 Those of us campaigning against the normalisation of violence are therefore struggling on a number of fronts, and not just about abuse of women or peer bullying in schools. Corporal punishment is no longer allowed in UK schools, but it remains permitted in many countries. A recent landmark report by End Violence Against Children (May 2023) revealed that school corporal punishment is still lawful in 63 states worldwide – comprising approximately 793 million children or half of the global school-age population.

⁉️ Many organisations try to work with schools in these countries to show the harm done and to develop alternatives to corporal punishment. I recall one initiative where after the workshop, a teacher proudly announced that she had found an alternative to beating children. ‘I just make them kneel on sharp gravel’ she said. (I can see readers wince here).  

So how to break the circle?  

✅ Although there are marginal improvements in some of the global data on violence and gendered violence, we sometimes seem no nearer. Research shows that parents who have themselves been beaten as children are more likely to hit their own children.  It is likely that husbands who have experienced male control in their home as children will be more likely to see that as the norm and to exert control over their own wives. The data on the acceptability of hitting wives or children vary by religion and ethnicity.  So is there a role for religious leaders here?  But it would have to be in the right direction. Just two years ago. An archbishop called for the reintroduction of corporal punishment in schools in Kenya. 

✅ Meanwhile, while not reaching directly into the home, educational efforts have to continue and hope the impact persists and spreads.  The new ConnectFutures programme for students Healthy and Happy Relationships tackles gendered roles and gendered violence.  Its theme is ‘Crossing The Line’, to get students to discuss what sort of statements and views cross the line into unacceptability.   These include statements such as ‘If my girlfriend was speaking to another boy, I would find a bat to beat her’, ‘Women belong to men and are passed between them.’  and ‘Violence is OK if the person deserves it’.  Interestingly, such statements mirror the questions asked in the World Values Survey mentioned earlier – which reveal the cultural norms that drive what is acceptable or not in a society.  

It is challenging some of these norms, which is the harder part, and we would really appreciate comments, dialogue and experiences on these crucial questions. 

Prof. Lynn Davies is an Emeritus Professor of International Education at the University of Birmingham, UK and Co-Director of the ConnectFutures. She has worked extensively in the area of education and conflict for the last 15 years, specifically in education, extremism and security.