How to move forward when we mess up

We’ve created a mess at one point or another in our life. We’ve said and done things we’re not proud of. None of us are immune from this so I wanted to take this moment to share some insights that occurred for me so we can collectively grow beyond the hurt and suffering. For it is only when we truly heal ourselves, that we have the possibility to heal others.

First thing first; when you have such an experience, it’s important to create SPACE, both for ourselves and others.

Space for us to recognize and internalize the pain we have caused and take responsibility for what’s ours.

Space for us to realize who we were BEING - consciously or unconsciously.

Space for us to realize the disconnection we experienced from who we would like to be.

This processing allows us to recognize and then declare what’s acceptable and no longer acceptable in our behavior.

Notice that the emphasis is on our own behavior and not the other party. That is because our own behavior is all we can truly control. And as many of you know, we still fall short. So let’s clean up our own house before we point the finger.

Notice that the emphasis is on our own behavior and not the other party.

We must take full ownership for our thoughts, speech and actions. Fully accept what occurred and not justify that which isn’t acceptable. No one made us say or do anything. Our actions and reactions are all but our own. They may happen consciously or unconsciously but they are ours to own.

We must fully process this. Otherwise the better version of us, the higher self, the pure loving spirit that our soul represents doesn’t have room to show up.

Ask yourself -

• Who showed up in that instance?
• How can I communicate my underlying need without being triggered?
• Can I really accept that I will not always be ____ by others?
• Can I express disappointment without becoming disappointing?
• Who do I want to BE going forward?

Can we grow from this? YES. If we make that choice. If a lotus can rise up from the mud, so can we. We have the same God given potential and possibility.

If a lotus can rise up from the mud, so can we.

If you have ever experienced something like this, I want you to know that you CAN recover from this. But you must own your actions and their consequences. Write down every time a particular situation has occurred for you and sit with it. Feel it and process it. That’s how it gets resolved and moves out of your physical body.

Acceptance of who we have been creates the possibility for something new to emerge. Express your desire to change wholeheartedly for who you aspire to be.

Declare who you intend to become. Share it with others. Write it down. Put a sticky on your desk. Note it as a recurring task in your to do list. Have your commitment to yourself and others show up everywhere so it never escapes your consciousness for a second.

Declare who you intend to become.

I declared that I intend to be loving, kind and compassionate even when I get triggered.

At the same time we must do everything in our power to hold ourselves accountable. We must apologize for who we have been. We must make amends as feasible to reverse the harm we’ve caused. We must seek help if required and make every effort to improve.

If we justify the harm we’ve caused, the possibility of causing similar harm in the future stays within us as a seed. And at one point or another, we will create that possibility again.

This difficult moment we’re talking about can be a gift for our growth. Only if we make it such a possibility!

Realize it. Accept it. Own it. Commit to improving and follow through with meaningful action.

Realize it. Accept it. Own it. Follow through.

Let's commit to showing up as our best self EVERYDAY so we may rise up from the mud as the beautiful LOTUS within.

P.S.

I'd love to hear your thoughts here.

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