How Nervous System Interventions Help and Talking Hinders (The View of a Talking Therapist)
Lucy Gleeson
Harnessing the wisdom of psychology to enable you to lead authentically and with more impact.
Lucy Gleeson MSc, Integrative & Energy Psychotherapist, Coach & Facilitator, Co-founder of The Woven Leader Programme
You've likely encountered the terms "fight, flight, or freeze" in discussions about stress responses. However, the scenarios of colleagues engaged in physical combat, sprinting for the exit, or playing dead, are seldom witnessed in our daily working lives. This article aims to unravel what happens on a more personal level when your nervous system transitions into a defensive state. Additionally, we'll explore simple yet powerful exercises designed to assist you during such moments.
Addressing anxiety, stress, worry, or challenging situations through talking has long been recognised as a cathartic process and can help to problem-solve. However, what often goes overlooked is the potential downside of continually talking about these issues — a feeling of disorientation, emotional vulnerability, or an intensified perception of the problem. Well-intentioned conversations, whether with colleagues or professionals, might inadvertently worsen the situation, leaving individuals feeling lost and struggling to regain emotional balance.
There are also instances where repeated discussions about the same issue yield no tangible results, or changes made are temporary. Changing our external environment is a common solution only to find that the behavioural or emotional patterns recur. In some cases, talking alone fails to provide the desired outcomes.
As humans we have become proficient at language and thinking, almost to the detriment of our feeling and intuition, and we can’t think our way out of feelings or behaviour patterns.
To gain a broader perspective, let's consider humans not just as verbal communicators but as energetic beings with a nervous system. When our nervous system is activated, continually discussing or deeply contemplating the triggering factor can exacerbate our distress.
My realisation of this phenomenon deepened during my extensive work with clients. Intrigued by a desire to approach these challenges differently, I explored alternative methodologies and dedicated eighteen months to studying a Diploma in Energy Psychotherapy. This transformative experience fundamentally altered my approach, enabling me to provide more profound and sustained support to my clients and coachees. Importantly, it equipped them with practices that could be implemented between sessions and long after our work concluded.
Here’s the science part for those who like a deeper understanding-
Stephen Porges' polyvagal theory played a pivotal role in enhancing my understanding. He posits that the nervous system comprises of circuits that regulate our baseline state and transmit information from the body to the brain stem. This information then facilitates access to different brain functions. In safe states, we access high cortical function; however, in stressful situations, these functions shut down, leading to defensive reactions. Feeling safe and calm allows for a greater diversity of expression and positive outcomes.
According to Porges, we need to understand that these responses are not voluntary; rather, they are neurobiological reactions to environmental stimuli. The polyvagal theory underscores that our nervous system transitions us through different states triggered by environmental cues. These triggers, often unknown to us, vary based on our past experiences, personality traits, lifestyle, and perceived needs.
To explain more simply, let’s go back to what is commonly cited as the autonomic nervous system function, with two strands - sympathetic nervous system or fight/flight and parasympathetic or rest and digest – where in fact both systems are involved whether the body is feeling under stress or calm.
The Parasympathetic has two strands, these are social engagement and immobilisation, and the sympathetic (arousing) has one. Fight or flight is easy to understand, will you fight or run away but in a work environment it may present as confrontation, fear, panic or avoidance of a person or situation. Perhaps being more visible or going for a promotion causes fear? What behaviour resonates for you?
In relation to others, you may struggle to set or keep boundaries, forgo your needs because you don’t want to upset others. In another strand of this complex system, you may procrastinate or ‘day dream’ instead of completing business critical tasks.
When we feel safe and supported, our rest and digest system activates, fostering a sense of drive, focus, innovation, grounding, and the ability to relax and recharge. Consider how being in this state more often would enrich your performance and wellbeing.
If you resonate with these observations, your nervous system is doing its job. It signals stress in the way it should. When stressed, our nervous system is designed to protect us, and if we ignore its signals, it will intensify until we are forced to pay attention, potentially leading to illness.
Ideally, our systems are crafted to dwell in a calm state, only tapping into stress when our environment demands it. Yet, in the whirlwind of our busy and intricate world, our systems often find themselves entangled in a chronic state of stress, a departure from their intended design.
Focusing on our nervous system and our energy can enhance our well-being and performance. While working with our energy system might seem relatively new in Western cultures, it has been a central focus in Eastern cultures for thousands of years.
Terms like Chi, Prana, Qi, or Life Force all refer to the energy that flows through all matter. Acknowledging and managing our own energy can significantly impact our performance and well-being.
Remaining in a constant state of calm is unrealistic and unnatural. However, if we possess the awareness and resources to recognise when our energy is imbalanced and can easily shift our state.
Effectively managing our bioenergetics well, contributes to a flexible and well-functioning neurobiological system. This, in turn, leads to increased productivity, reduced chronic stress and burnout, enhanced clarity and communication, and a more authentic experience of self.
Simple practices to support your nervous system are:
Energy balancing techniques:
Recommended by LinkedIn
First stand or sit with your eyes closed for a moment and notice how you feel in your mind and body. You may feel full, busy, unfocussed, tired, overwhelmed.
1) Wayne Cook Posture
(Named in honor of Wayne Cook, a pioneering researcher of Bioenergetics Force Field, this creates a kind of ‘figure of 8’ loop helping left and right brain to balance).
2) Homolateral Balancing Correction
Take time to notice any difference you feel after these practices, what do you notice. It’s different for everyone but hopefully you feel a little calmer in your mind and body. The more often you do this the greater the affect.
(original source of exercises unknown, taught by Ruthie Smith & Phil Mollen)
Thank you for taking the time and energy to read this today, I hoped it helped to calm your nervous system and balance your energy.
The Woven Leader Programme
The Woven Leader is a transformational two-month hybrid leader development programme with three elements:
1. One to one coaching (before and after the retreat),
2. A three-day retreat in a rural Cotswolds house for a critical step back
3. Community, to supported integration of the learning support individuals to sustain and embed change in the real world.
This programme has been carefully designed and is delivered by us, Jane Martin and Lucy Gleeson, both experienced coaches, psychotherapists and psychologists. We are experts in the field of transformational personal development and authentic leadership.
Lucy is a UKCP registered psychotherapist, coach and facilitator with over 20 years learning and development experience and 2,500 coaching and therapy hours. Her background is as a highly experienced L&D professional with significant sales, training, coaching and management experience in the pharmaceutical industry. Lucy runs a successful private practice alongside her corporate work and uses energy and body work combined with more traditional frames of working.
Jane is a psychologist, psychotherapist, facilitator, NLP practitioner and coach, with a corporate background in publishing and pharmaceuticals. She has worked extensively both clinically and corporately over many years to help individuals and teams thrive. Jane also holds an MSc (Dist) in OD – Leading and Facilitating Change in a VUCA World and is qualified in breathwork and harnessing nature to support coaching outcomes.
Through our own personal development and working as psychotherapists and delivering leadership and change programmes over the past fifteen years, we have seen what is needed and have now brought our expertise together into this extraordinary programme. It is making an impact and we would like to bring it to more people.
Contact us to find out more at hello@thewovenleader.co.uk