How a Twitter troll inspired a moment of reflection & a robust introduction to my career and my practice
My relationship with social media has depended on where I have lived. For the 15 years during which I lived in Bahrain (2004-2011) and Qatar (2011-2019), I stayed off of Twitter and self-censored my posts on other social media platforms.
When I returned to NYC after 15 years in the Arabian Gulf, I had some inkling but not a full understanding yet of just how toxic social media had become in America while I was "behind the veil". In the four short years since I have been home, I at first dabbled with social media and then, when Elon Musk purchased Twitter (now X), intrigued, I hopped on to support Musk's "Free Speech" initiative. Whether it was my having had to self-censor for so long, the fact that we have entered a highly polarized social media milieu, or that I just did not have a knack for using social media, some of my tweets went viral and there was some vitriolic backlash. Let's blame it on my having lived in the hyper-conservative Arabian Gulf for my clumsy use of Twitter and the consequences thereof.
I stay on Twitter - despite the potential for vitriol - because I have accidentally found a community of like-minded and civic-minded New Yorkers and Americans. But I digress.
Sometimes, someone who disagrees with me will rudely antagonize me and question my judgment. When I reply, I say that my different views do not belie a lack of judgment.
Last week, a troll - another lawyer from North Carolina - poked me into introducing myself properly by accusing me of not being able to handle conflict adequately. Twitter - like all social media platforms, including LinkedIn - only shows a snapshot of my life and my career. We always carefully curate what we show and it is almost always the best stuff, not the challenges and difficulties. My response stunned me; it turned out to be a moment of clarity around what I have done so far in my life and career and how I managed to do it, survive and thrive against great odds.
On LinkedIn, I have almost exclusively shown you the sausage, not how the sausage was made (proverbially, of course). In this article, I would like to look at my journey from another angle. Let me reintroduce myself to you as I introduced myself to the man - a JD (I'm not sure if he is also a lawyer) - who challenged me on Twitter:
"It seems you do not know me professionally. Let me introduce myself so you are not under the mistaken impression that I do not know how to resolve conflicts.
In 2004, I traveled to Bahrain - sight unseen - to take up a position with Orbit, a pan-Arab pay satellite TV company that was moving its HQ from Rome to Bahrain where I cut my teeth on multi-million dollar commercial satellite contracts. Regularly managed extremely difficult punters who wanted to knock me out of my seat while successfully managing my intense workload.
In 2008, moved to a British law firm in Bahrain which was more like being recruited by a Rugby Team. Have you ever seen anyone play rugby in heels?
In 2011, moved to Al Jazeera Media Network during the Arab Spring. You have no idea how much conflict I successfully resolved - both for the company and within the company. Fended off assassination threats, hacking, slashed tired, attempted sex-set-ups, and unbelievable bullying. Managed a multi-billion portfolio of global projects. Never lost my cool.
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In 2015-2017 - I found myself litigating against the shady start-up in Qatar that shafted me out of nearly $100k in salary. Sued them in the Qatar Civil Court. Represented myself. Won. Never lost my cool.
Successfully won a series of disputes for clients who were typically the "underdog".
Qatar Airways - again, a tough crowd but still managed my multi-billion dollar portfolio of projects in the Contracts and Compliance Departments. My boss was a screamer and very tricky colleagues. Never lost my cool.
Just because I asked how others got their clients, doesn't mean I don't know how to get clients.
Minor scuffle with upset dog-loving North Carolinian with a JD - child's play.
There is nothing wrong with my legal skills or conflict resolution skills and I would question the judgment of another lawyer (?) who berates another lawyer on Twitter simply for having different views. It is unbecoming.
There are few lawyers around - in NY or otherwise - whom I have met (although I have met a few) who got the same depth and breadth of experience at my age - with my global cross-border experience, my specific cutting-edge new technology experience, who can turn complex contracts around and translate them into user-friendly maps for stakeholders to use all while chaos abounds around her, and who can single-handledly juggle several multi-billion dollar contracts at the same time in a particularly hostile environment - while wearing heels. Can you do that?
It is easy to fall into the trap of defining yourself based on what people say about and/or to you - positively or negatively. Maturity is not listening to the detractors and being guided by your own inner compass and self-knowledge.
Attorney advertising. Prior results do not guarantee a similar outcome.
Amazing ❤️ Sonya Shaykhoun, Esq., LL.M.
Founder & Executive Coach | Conquer Overwhelm, Master Opportunity | Secure Your Edge with Finesse
1ySonya Shaykhoun, Esq., LL.M. - No fancy hat on a 🐪 camel. Sausage, bollocks, 👠 high heels, and RUGBY 🏉 rugby meets a troll. Game On!