Idiotopedia: The Rule of Thumbs

Disclaimer: This is not a TED Talk script; it's real life. If you're not ready to face that life is messy, uncertain, and sometimes just plain silly, you can click "X" in the right corner. If you thought there were hard and fast rules for being successful, you're wrong. Consider this a reminder that you can always fail; sometimes, it's the best option to let it be.

Anyway, as I sit here and think about my journey, I see that it is not at all a success story. You have come to the wrong place if you want to read another "rags to riches" story. Life for me has been much more complicated, difficult, and eventually enlightening. I've been trying to be a jack of all trades, including being a ca survivor. When I built businesses, I sometimes saw them do very well; other times, they just failed.

Yes, I've kept a set of codes—kind of like personal "rules"—that have helped me get through the bad parts of business, technology, and life.

Rule #1: Stop using buzzwords.        

Being involved in tech and green startups has taught me that buzzwords are just as useless as yesterday's news stories. Long-term, and something new. Not always good. You must have rolled your eyes many times when you heard these words. I don't mean to sound like I'm on the cutting edge by using these words. In fact, you probably aren't innovative if you have to say you are. I focus on making a real difference in my work, especially in the world of green innovation. I don't just want to say I'm part of the "green revolution." You're just making more noise if you're not fixing problems in the real world.

Rule #2: Working together is overrated (until it isn't)        

People love to talk about how important it is to work together. It is beautiful when it works, for sure. Actually, most partnerships are a pain. They slow you down, cause extra trouble, and often make your thoughts less strong. I used to think working with others would help me get ahead faster in school. Not surprisingly, it didn't. Collaboration didn't really pay off until I teamed up with the "right" people—those who shared my vision and weren't afraid to have tough talks. Nowadays, as an investor, I only work with people who are ready to push me and understand why I'm skeptical.

Rule #3: Life is an experiment all the time        

I've studied, taught, and run startups for years. No matter what, one thing stays the same: nothing changes. I saw the market as a huge lab when I was trying to build a green investment fund in Southeast Asia. For all your financial planning, the factors are always changing. The world of regulations? Indeed, it is constantly moving. Do consumers want it? Well, not expected. That's why I approach life and work like a set of trials. You make an assumption, try it, and if it doesn't work, you make changes. Rest assured that it fails the vast majority of the time.

Rule #4: The myth of the mentorship        

Many times during my work, people have asked me about my mentors, expecting many famous people in my field who took me under their wing. I did not have a fairy tale guide, I'm sorry to say. I had some partners who helped me, but I've always thought that having a mentor isn't helpful unless you're ready to do more than follow their advice. People have believed that a guide will help them succeed for too long. Mistaken! No more than giving you a place to start, a guide. Thereafter, you're by yourself. Most of the way I've found my way has been by trial and error—more by my mistakes than by anyone else's advice.

Rule #5: Being successful is boring.        

To be completely honest, success is boring. It is safe, expected, and, to be honest, overrated. The failures—those painful, gut-wrenching times when everything goes wrong—make the stories worth telling. That's where the knowledge is. Reflecting on my time working for big companies or investing in different startups, I don't often remember the deals that went perfectly. I think about the ones that didn't work out and the hard facts I faced because of them. If all you want is success, you're not seeing the point.

Rule #6: Don't waste time on "balance."        

Work-life balance? That's a bunch of bullsh*t! It makes no sense to want balance if you love what you do. It's fine that passion takes over your life. Many people talk about "unplugging" or balancing work and personal life, but I've never been able to do either. There was no work-life balance for me when I faced my current condition; I just had to stay alive.

End of a Journey That Will Last Forever

For the last part of this grumpy old man story, I used to believe that when you started a business, there were only two outcomes: everything would work out or fail. I kept my head down and worked hard through every problem, investment, and failure. Then, take a break? Well, I didn't know how to use them. I didn't try to find balance because I thought it impossible. My goal stayed the same even as I started to invest in green startups and help the next generation of good entrepreneurs. No one tells you this, but the story is that it's not about finding balance; it's about finding happiness. And it turns out that happiness is much messier than I thought it would be.

Again, the most surprising thing isn't the purchases that paid off or the businesses that took off. Being able to let go is what the story is really about. The most important thing I learned after years of trying to get ahead, get degrees, get noticed, and deal with personal problems was how important it is to let go. I've been holding on to ideas, people, and success stories that are no longer useful for too long. People hold on because they think it will help them succeed, but people who know when to walk away are strong. Yes, letting go is not only the right thing to do sometimes; it's also the hardest thing you can do. Being able to let go of something that no longer motivates you, an investment that didn't work out, or even a dream that doesn't fit with the person you've become is what frees you. I've learned to value the fact that life is most stable when it's not predictable. I've learned that real power comes from being able to change directions, the rules, and the plan as many times as needed. This is what I want to leave behind. It wasn't the businesses I started or the short-lived wins that made me wise. It was knowing when to let go and move on. Because what we let go of is sometimes more valuable than what we hold on to in the first place. More than anything else, that's what has given me the freedom and happiness I thought were so hard to find.

How many thumbs do I have on my fingers? Well... Just keep adding them! That's Real Life... Enjoy the journey!