Managing negative emotions/worries in your job search - 9 tips to help

Wondering why you don't hear back from sending your CV for roles? Or having more than 2-3 interviews without success?

It could be your emotions/worries getting in your way.

There's posts every day from job seekers on LinkedIn, many of them reaching out for help. Most often they're not in a good place. And understandably so.

Last week I spoke to two finance people looking for a new role:

• One's been made redundant.
• The other has been dismissed.

They were, understandably, not in a good place. A mixture of frustration, anger, and disappointment.

Add to that heightened stress and worry as they both need to find something asap (all while still feeling aggrieved with what's happened).

Compunded by it happening at this time of the year (with Xmas upcoming)

You don't have to be made redundant or dismissed to be looking for a job. Most often, your job search is fuelled by negative emotion-inducing reasons; some frustration, irritation, disappointment, disagreement and the like. (It's rarely a happy, positive time)

While you can't switch off these worries and emotions, they pose a problem.

Negative emotions too dominant = bad news for your job search.

Not addressing and effectively managing the internal negativity/chatter means your emotions are too 'dominant'. This will impact your job search. You'll rush into applying for jobs (without tailoring your CV to requirements), diving into interviews without getting your prep nailed on. Your negative emotions will impede you in interviews.

How it might be affecting you:

Application stage:

- You could make mistakes in the job application stage

Especially the case of applying direct.

If going through an agency, there are *some that will look beyond the mistakes. Many may not, though, meaning you may slip through the net more.

- You'll miss out on interviews for jobs you feel you're a good fit for because you might miss out on adding/tweaking/expanding on crucial information in your CV before sending it to a company/hiring manager.

Tailoring your CV for each role is crucial. Doesn't have to be a rewrite each time. Far from it. Just some tweaks/additions/reordering to bring out what is important for that client.

At interview

- Your negative emotions will come across in an interview.

It will come across subconsciously even if you think you may be hiding it.

- In your interview, you won't be able to give the best, most articulate, well-considered version of yourself.

- The lack of 'calm' 'focus' in your mind will mean you don't provide the best or most thorough examples/experiences when asked competency questions.

Feedback like "Struggled to give answers" or "his/her answers were not structured or detailed enough" is common feedback I get.

- 'My mind went blank' or "I've thought of a better response" reaction post-interview - sound familiar? That is often the result of too many (negative) emotions in your mind clouding you.

You're getting in your way

How to work on this and improve your job search prospects?

I love this part of my job as a recruiter.

I like to use the benefit of experience and a desire to see someone at their best in every interview to help them beyond the transactional part of being a recruiter.

There's nothing more satisfying than to give someone practical, technical, mtivationals AND emotional support around their job search.

Part of my role as a recruiter is to provide emotional well-being support to help them create a level of calmness, clarity and focus on what matters - nailing a job interview.

It means only going for 1-3 different interviews and ensuring you get at least one.

Here are nine tips/pointers to help managed those job search worries:

Before attending any interview (and in between interviews):

1. Write down your negative emotions, and take the time to process them.

I talk about writing/journaling to improve mental health. Writing things down can help you process your emotions way better than having them swirling around in your head.

2. Remember, it is a temporary phase. It's not a reflection of your skill or abilities.

So, don't be too harsh on yourself. A bit of self-compassion will go a long way.

3. Use those negative emotions as a motivating tool.

You might not feel it right now, but you are good at what you do. You've proven it across previous roles.

4. Embrace some stress as a good thing, as it will keep you on your toes, both when prepping for an interview and the interview itself

5. Speak to people. A mixture of a close friend, partner/family member, or people you trust whom you've worked with. A support network is crucial at this time.

For interviews:

6. Don't rush an application. Avoid sending your CV out en masse.

Invest time in your CV (tweaking for each role) and then sit down to 'learn' about your projects, value-add and key achievements across all of your roles.

Focus on quality.

7. Start to list your strengths, projects and achievements from all your roles asap.

And keep adding to them as you think of them. Once you think of a few your mind will recall more.

8. Take plenty of pre- and post-interview time to focus on clearing your mind.

Be that mindfulness, exercise, some breathwork (esp before), going outside or going for a walk. Whatever helps you take your mind off things.

9. Don't 'doom scroll' when looking for a job. It will make managing your negative emotions/worries a lot harder.

Apportion some time each day to look for roles, but step away from your laptop and do other things that are focussed on you, your wellbeing and the people in your life that matter.

Finally, speak to one or two recruiters to help you not just in the transactional, practical part of finding you a job but providing interview prep and emotional well-being management tips.

Ask them how they plan to support you beyond sending your jobs and setting up interviews.

Thanks for reading.

#jobsearchtips #jobsearchadvice #lookingforwork #lookingforopportunities