The Power of Permission

This week, I was talking to one of the customers of my Introvert Success Toolkit and she said something that made me pause.

In telling me of the ways in which my toolkit had already changed her behaviour and had impact she said, "It's given me permission to be an introvert."

She then left me a LinkedIn review saying, 'The best gift I got from the toolkit was permission to be myself. It's a toolkit that's helped me embrace a comfortable and genuine style of marketing, selling, and showing up. I feel more at peace with how I choose to show up, not only for the people around me but also for myself. It was a sense of permission that I didn't realise I had been waiting for.'

A sense of permission that I didn't realise I had been waiting for.

Many of the emails and DMs I receive from members of my community have a similar theme but I hadn't previously made the connection, as what they have been saying to me had always been more implicit than explicit.

It's human nature to seek out validation and approval - regardless of personality type.

But the reason this concept of feeling as an introvert that you have permission to be yourself if SO important as introverts are surrounded by people telling them that who they are isn't enough; that who they are is somehow 'wrong'.

There is a societal and workplace bias in favour of extroversion.

If you've followed me for any length of time you'll know I talk about it a lot. Because it's important: whilst around half the world's population are introverts this bias means that everything from our workplaces to our social events to our concept of success is rooted in extrovert needs and ideals.

This means that introverts have to work extra hard not just to succeed but just to exist, often feeling forced to wear a mask. But masking is exhausting and commonly leads to burnout and/ or mental health issues.

They have to prove themselves as leaders in a way that extroverts don't, even though statistically introverts make better leaders. They have to navigate an additional layer of bias on an intersectional level. And they have to face the constant chipping away at their self-belief by being told they're 'too quiet' regardless of their performance on their deliverables.

Introverts in open offices often have to deal with constantly being over-stimulated and have to force themselves to concentrate through frequent interruptions. Mostly their working conditions aren't ones that enable them to thrive.

I've had messages from introverts who've been rejected from roles that didn't even require interaction with other humans because they're 'too introverted.'

I've coached executives who're exceptionally high-performing and well-respected but being told they 'lack presence'.

And when I was with Google I spoke to thousands of introverts across 169 countries globally who all were being made to feel they weren't enough and so were battling Imposter Syndrome and limiting beliefs.

None of this is okay, but it's our current reality.

I developed my Introvert Success Toolkit based on my own journey to self-acceptance, on the things that had worked for me.

Like anyone else, I still like to receive validation but once I was able to develop authentic confidence I also developed the ability to give myself permission to be an introvert; to be myself.

When introverts feel they have permission to be themselves, the benefits can be transformative. Here are some key advantages:

1. Increased Confidence

• Less Self-Doubt: When you embrace your introverted nature, you stop questioning your worth or feeling the need to compare yourself to more extroverted peers. This leads to a stronger sense of self-assurance.
• Authentic Interactions: Knowing it's okay to be yourself means you can communicate more genuinely. You no longer feel the pressure to put on a facade, which often leads to more meaningful and fulfilling relationships.

2. Better Mental Health

• Reduced Anxiety and Burnout: Pretending to be someone you're not, especially in social settings, can be exhausting. When you feel permission to be yourself, you can honour your energy levels and set boundaries that protect your mental well-being.
• Increased Self-Acceptance: Accepting your introversion helps reduce feelings of shame or inadequacy, leading to improved self-esteem and a kinder self-image.

3. Improved Productivity and Focus

• Leveraging Your Strengths: Introverts often excel in deep, focused work. When you give yourself permission to lean into your natural preferences for quiet, uninterrupted time, you can become more productive and deliver higher-quality results.
• Less Time Wasted on People-Pleasing: Instead of spending energy trying to fit into environments or roles that don't suit you, you can focus on tasks and projects that align with your strengths.

4. Enhanced Creativity

• Freedom to Explore Ideas: Introverts often have rich inner worlds. When you feel permission to retreat and reflect, you tap into your creativity without the pressure of constant social interaction or external validation.
• New Perspectives: Embracing your natural inclinations allows you to approach problems and ideas differently, offering unique insights and innovative solutions.

5. Stronger, Deeper Relationships

• Quality Over Quantity: With the permission to be yourself, you can prioritise deeper connections over superficial socialising. This leads to more meaningful relationships with people who appreciate you for who you truly are.
• Clearer Boundaries: When you accept your introversion, it's easier to communicate your needs, set boundaries, and find people who respect them, resulting in healthier and more satisfying interactions.

6. Greater Life Satisfaction

• Living Authentically: When you allow yourself to be who you truly are, your life choices—whether in your career, hobbies, or relationships—become more aligned with your values and preferences. This leads to a more fulfilling and purposeful life.
• Reduced Pressure to Conform: Feeling the freedom to be yourself means you no longer have to meet societal expectations of being 'more outgoing' or 'more social.' This shift reduces stress and lets you live in a way that feels natural and comfortable.

7. Empowerment and Self-Advocacy

• Owning Your Narrative: When you give yourself permission to be an introvert, you take control of your story instead of letting others define it. This empowers you to advocate for your needs in personal and professional settings.
• Inspiring Others: By being unapologetically yourself, you can become a role model for other introverts who struggle with self-acceptance, creating a ripple effect of authenticity and empowerment.

Giving YOURSELF permission to be yourself is a mindset shift that allows introverts to live more confidently, authentically, and happily.

So I challenge you to start giving yourself that permission today!

And if you'd like a little extra help, you can download my Introvert Success Toolkit for a special discounted price until 30th November: it will NEVER be this price again!

Please feel free to share this newsletter with anyone it may help.

Thank you 💛

Much love,

Sam

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P.S. Ways I can help you:

1. Download your Introvert Success Toolkit here.
2. Check out my other digital products for introverts here.
3. Sign up for my email newsletter for monthly inspiration here (from 2025 I'll be moving my LinkedIn newsletter fully monthly so I can focus on my email subscribers).

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About Me

I'm Sam ✨ and I'm on a mission to change the workplace bias towards extroversion, to achieve greater, intersectional, inclusivity for introverts.

As well as help high achieving introverts to thrive without changing who they are.

Companies:

I offer consulting, training and coaching for DEI professionals, leaders/ managers and those involved in hiring.

I am also a keynote speaker.

p.s. I LOVE to travel 😉

Introverts:

I can help you achieve your professional goals, feel confident in your introversion and be able to step into your power OR I can help you escape the 9-5 and achieve optimal wellbeing through financial freedom, through coaching, community and/ or digital products.

DM me for more information!