A Powerful Alternative to New Year's Resolutions.
It's January 4th and I'm exhausted already.
My social media feeds are full of posts encouraging me to do more, be better, start this, stop that. The ubiquitous 'New Year's Resolutions' posts abound. (And belated apologies as I've ridden this bandwagon in the past - several times).
It's exhausting.
New Year's Eve has been bestowed with almost magical powers of transformation. 'Almost magical' being key, since most of the promises of New-Year-New-Me fall by the wayside within a matter of weeks, if not days.
10...9...8...7...
Our eyes glued to the glittering ball, or the face of Big Ben, our hearts race...
6...5...4...
Excitement, anticipation, full of hope for the new year, our hopes and dreams are tantalizingly close...
3...2...1...
BONG! The sound of anticlimax and reality crashes around us. Everything is the same. Everyone is the same. I am the same.
Now I realize I'm conflating New Year's Eve with New Year's resolutions, however, come on, admit it, at some point in your life you've created a self-imposed "things will be different next year" mantra, only to find a few weeks later that you're still in the grip of the same old habits you were determined to change. Unlike the disclaimer for financial investments my experience of resolutions is that they epitomize "Past performance is an indication of future performance". Or maybe that's just me. Whatevs.
Here's the thing, if something was that important to us we would surely do it, and do it now. Not wait for some arbitrary date to be the switch for change (and if at any time in December you told yourself "I'll have one now and start my diet in Jan" then I rest my case).
Now before you all declare me a killjoy, let me explain.
THE OLD Morag's approach might've included such gems as:
FYI this might be the right point to introduce the standard disclaimer - This is a hypothetical list of resolutions and a product of my imagination. Any resemblance to actual New Year's Resolutions, or lists of resolutions, made by you, or anyone you know is purely coincidental [insert the Law & Order 'ching ching'].
Here was my epiphany as I girded my loins for the transition into 2022. Realizing that this year is likely to be very similar to last year I decided not to make a list of new year's resolutions.
I know! That's just crazy talk!!
However the advantage of my resolution to make no resolutions, is that there are no promises on which I will under deliver. . No opportunity for regret or a self-administered "If Only". This is a winning formula.
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THE NEW approach I am adopting is short and sweet. It focuses only on the here and now, on today. No future aspirations. Just a fresh start every 24 hours.
It's A New Day Resolution
It starts with:
Today I am...
et voila - SUCCESS!
OK, I sense some of you are already questioning my approach here. I hear the shouts of "Foul! That's still a resolution." or calls for the "Goal Judge" but this ain't ice hockey. Yes, it's semantics. But when it comes to changing habits semantics matter.
Anything goes, as long as something goes.
With this new approach anything goes, as long as something goes. In my case:
Today I am...
Here's what semantics has brought me - FOUR wins, every day this year, vs a missed goal, and a sense of failure. And the even better news? This works for ANY goal.
As that sage Michael Bublé says (cue earworm)
"It's a new dawn
It's a new day
It's a new life
For me
And I'm feeling good"
How's your list of resolutions faring? Maybe it's time for you to drop the New Year's Resolutions and join me with "Today I am".
You're welcome.
President @ Advance Learning Group | Certified Executive Coach
2yMorag, what I gather is say no to New Year's resolutions, not changes or goals that you can set anytime. And to especially take delight in daily (or I'll be bold and say weekly) goals and their accomplishment. The more you do that, the longer the term you can seek. I believe the idea of New Year's is it's a start line. So wherever you draw your line on the ground, be sure to set your goals as you move forward. The easiest goal to set is to make someone's day every day!
Leadership Development for Purpose-Driven Leaders
2yNodding my head in agreement! 👏
Assistant Commissioner, TN Dept of Human Resources
2yThanks, Morag. The 24-hour refresh cycle and bite-sized goals (you’re the one who mentioned portion control) is a good reminder for me. One more thing… Now I have that catchy Buble big band riff stuck in my head!
Independent Planning & Pre-Construction Services | Consultant Construction Professional | Freelance Senior Planner | Bid Writer | Claims Planner | Cause & Effect Analysis | Director | Construction enthusiast
2yI guess this follows the old “how do you eat an elephant?” “One piece at a time” adage, and will be trying to follow it! Thank you for sharing, and all the best - Steve
Leadership and Career Coach, Retired
2yLove your post. I stopped resolutions and moved to a theme for the year and it has served me well and helped me to change behaviors and thought processes. Themes have included “patience” (this was so helpful esp when working with my dementia mom); positivity (looking for the good in the moment) and this year an acronym GROS: get rid of ‘stuff’ that relates to things, behaviors, people or whatever does not serve my life and purpose. A sort of shedding. #beyourbestself #lifeisajourney #blessed2022