Stress Isn’t The Boss. You Are.

Welcome to April: Stress Awareness Month.

We have all just been through an incredibly stressful year with a lot of change—a life-changing pandemic, isolation, social distancing, a new digital work environment, a new presidential administration, and overall, a new way of life.

This is on top of the regular stress of life. According to the Global Organization for Stress, 75% of adults reported experiencing moderate to high levels of stress in the past month.

Stress is a natural part of life, and it’s not necessarily bad. It depends how we handle it. 

We’ve all felt eustress or good stress that is beneficial to us. I remember the stress of starting my first business—it was fun, exciting, and the good stress stretched me as a salesman. I learned lots of new things and grew. But we all have breakdowns.

I’m no stranger to stress, just as I’m sure you are not as well. However, over the course of my life I've learned that in order to maximize my potential, I have to be more strategic in managing my stress. Here’s what I’ve learned.

Spotting Stress In Yourself And Others

Self-awareness is critical to spot the impacts of stress in your life. Have you been grumpier, sleepier, or less enthusiastic about your role than usual? Stress manifests itself both physically and mentally, and in different ways for each person. Unchecked stress can negatively affect your overall well-being… and your teams’ wellbeing. 

At work, are you noticing your coworkers are often sick, late, taking days off, unusually quiet, or resigning? This may be a sign of stress magnifying to contribute to larger cultural issues within your organization. 

You can’t fix a problem until you are aware of it. So, whether it’s in your own life or existing within your team—being able to spot stress is mission-critical to success.

In my experience, effective communication is the best way to understand and resolve stress, within yourself and others. When you have one-on-ones with your team members, it’s important to create space for them to share the challenges they are experiencing. Similarly, when you have a conversation with your supervisor, be honest about your bandwidth and the difficulties you’re experiencing. And some conversations may be more appropriately held outside of the work environment. But we all need to talk and express ourselves in order to effectively manage our stress. 

Remember that in business, people are your most important asset. The better you take care of your people and empower them to take care of themselves, the better they can take care of the business. And the same is true for yourself.

Managing Stress 

Once you are aware of the stress in your life, you can choose how to take care of it. 

COVID-19 has created a unique challenge in that the lines between work and home are more blurred than ever. We don’t have a transition from home to work and back. However, being diligent around creating boundaries between your work and personal life will undeniably help you manage your stress. So, try to stop working on the weekends (or for part of the weekend) and outside of work hours. Plan and have some fun. And talk to your supervisor about how you can delegate if you have too much work on your plate.

Another way that we can manage stress is by taking breaks. 

As much as we want to accomplish things and be successful, we are not superhumans. We need to take deliberate, strategic breaks from our work in order to take care of ourselves. Vacations are important as they allow us to take a step back from our work, turn it off, “vacate,” eliminate external stressors, clear the decks, and come back to work with a new perspective and ready to go again.

Another strategy to manage stress is to cultivate a life team of friends and allies who will tell you the truth and help you uphold a vision of the highest version for yourself. Sometimes, we have blinders on about the things we care about, or we temporarily forget them in the middle of difficult battles. It can be hard for us to step out of our way and see how we may be negatively impacting our life and not fulfilling our vision. 

Having trusted confidants has made a huge difference in how I manage my stress. Not only am I married to a life coach, but I also have two coaches myself who help hold me accountable to my goals and my highest self. And I have close friends who are great allies that I talk to on a regular basis (daily).

Expanding Our Capacity 

On the positive side, I believe that stress has the ability to expand our capacity. If we are not feeling stress, we may not be stretching ourselves, or challenging ourselves, and taking on enough. But, it takes skill and intention to experience stress and manage it effectively. This is how we maximize our potential. This can be difficult to do when our work isn’t nourishing, and we are not taking responsibility to be nourished.

One of my favorite classic movies, The Shining, is the perfect reminder of this. There is a scene where Jack types over and over, “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy.” And, it’s TRUE. Your work should feel like play at some point, and if it doesn’t that’s a problem. And you need to intend and create play outside of work as well. 

Managing your stress might be as simple as taking on new responsibilities that light you up, or as significant as making a career change. It won’t just help you manage your stress, but it will help you step into your purpose and be more nourished. If you’re not doing work that you care about, you aren’t serving yourself or the world in the way you could be. When our work is nourishing and when we take the time to manage our stress, we are able to build our capacity to take on more and have a greater impact. 

Follow along this Stress Awareness Month as I share more resources, strategies, and tools to bring awareness to stress in service of maximizing your potential.