What It Means To Be the Black Sheep in Business

What does it mean to be a Black Sheep?

Most prevalently, a Black Sheep - or Scapegoat - is a person who is identified as "bad" within a family or group. Think of that person as a containment center in which family- or group-wide problems or issues are targeted to be this person's responsibility.

This can happen in business as well, where one person is singled out as "the problem." The scenario can include bullying and gaslighting, where leadership or employees gang up on the person labeled the Black Sheep, isolating them and manipulating conversation and people to amplify the designation.

If you are the Black Sheep in a business scenario, the result can be devastating. Not only do you have to endure being ostracized within your organization, you are being positioned as a "problem," which carries the possibility of impacting current and future professional opportunities.

Mentally, because gaslighting is a core tactic used in these situations, you may find yourself wondering if you're misreading the situation and questioning your own perspective.

But ... aren't there people who are truly "the problem?"

Nobody is perfect, and there are definitely instances in which a person being labeled "the problem" is actually in response to problematic behavior.

The Black Sheep phenomenon I'm referring to, however, is a specific situation in which a person is punished for speaking up against a dysfunctional system. These people tend to be similar in nature, predisposing them to step into this role.

Black Sheep are often:

• Strong-willed
• Empathic
• Justice-seeking
• Someone who internalizes blame
• Emotionally reactive
• Highly sensitive
• Protective of others
• Questioners of authority

Reading this list, it's easy to understand why someone with these characteristics would become a Black Sheep.

It is within the fabric of who these people are to step up and speak out if they see another colleague being mistreated, an unfair balance or misuse of power, or an ineffective system that is resulting in a lack of success. If any of these scenarios were to occur with healthy leadership in place - someone being mistreated, a misuse of power, or working within an ineffective system - the problem would be addressed and resolved.

With unhealthy leadership, however, the opposite can occur.

If leadership is the source of the mistreatment, misuse of power, or an unhealthy system, the person who speaks up can, in turn, be ostracized.

That is how Black Sheep are born.

Navigating Work Life As A Black Sheep

As someone who embodies all of the Black Sheep characteristics above, I recognize that these qualities can 100-percent get a person in trouble in any environment for being too much, too loud, too challenging, etc. It's simply the nature of the personality. When honed through experience and growth, however, these characteristics become essential to a healthy workplace. Where would we be without our strong-willed, protective, and justice-seeking team members? For positive change to occur, these people are necessary.

When these people are a part of an unhealthy organization, however, being the Black Sheep can not only be taken as a threat by leadership, but the response to their behavior can become extremely detrimental to their mental health.

If you are the Black Sheep, you may ...

1. ... think it's all in your head. At first, you are taken aback. You're trying to do the right thing, but your behavior is being met with hostility or push-back. Maybe you've tried to report unhealthy behavior through the checks-and-balances system, but are ignored or dismissed.
2. ... feel shame. After repeated incidents, you may begin to feel shame, but you may not recognize it as such. Maybe you grow increasingly depressed or are easily triggered to extreme anger.
3. ... feel trapped. Individuals who exercise control and power prey on isolating people. If you have been set apart as the Black Sheep, you may begin to feel more and more alone in your situation, leaving you feeling trapped.
4. ... forget you can get out. As your mental health deteriorates, you may tell yourself that "no one likes their job," that you need the money, that you have no choice. Do not allow workplace mistreatment or abuse to lead you to believe you have no way out.

Black Sheep often have big personalities easy to label as "too much." They struggle in unhealthy work environments because it goes against their sensibilities to watch someone be mistreated or to see ineffective business practices with an unwillingness to receive feedback and grow. They almost have to speak up.

What To Do if You Are the Black Sheep

There is no easy answer.

First, ask yourself why you're staying.

• Maybe you believe you have no choice. You don't think you'll find another job or you're "making too much money" to leave.
• Maybe you have come to believe the people around you, and your self-esteem has taken a hit. At this point, you don't believe anyone else would want to hire you.
• Maybe this is your "dream job" or it's the only opportunity of its kind. You know that if you walk away, you will never have another opportunity like it.
• Maybe you think this is how all workplace environments are because you've never known any different.

Being a Black Sheep can be confusing, because it may be difficult to tell whether you truly are "a problem." After all, you know you have personality traits that go hand-in-hand with rocking the boat. You have integrity, are unwilling to settle for less than the very best, and you refuse to stand idle while others are being mistreating. These are great qualities that are necessary in any organization.

At the same time, you are emotionally reactive, highly sensitive, and have no problem questioning systems and authority. Sometimes you need a little pushback.

Determining the health of the situation you're in may take some evaluation on your part.

But if you find yourself with misplaced or repressed anger, are struggling with depression, or simply hate going into work every day, perhaps it's time to sit down with those you trust. Not only can this type of situation potentially impact future job opportunities, it can wreak havoc on your body and mental health.

The people who love you will have helpful feedback to make sure you don't feel alone and are set up for success as the incredible person you are.

About First and Sober

First and Sober is about living life with presence. For some, that means first getting free from the hold alcohol has on their lives. For all, it means getting real about living each day wide awake and on purpose. If you believe you have a problem with alcohol you can't overcome on your own, please reach out for help.