You are NOT a people-pleaser

Hey lovely,

You are not a people-pleaser, you are conforming to a series of standards of behaviour that you’ve subconsciously learned (possibly as early as childhood) in order to keep you safe.

From a young age, we are taught to “be good”, “be quiet”, “hurry up”, “not stand out” and to “please others”.

As children, we learn that if we are “good” and “do what we are told” then we will be rewarded, and if we don’t there will be consequences. (This isn’t a dig at parents/caregivers, this is just how traditional parenting worked).

But the subconscious mind forgets nothing, therefore even if you have no explicit memories of this, you will have developed rules (life scripts), usually from a young age, but not always, on how best to behave to ensure your survival.

➡️ For example, an example of how a life script might show up for you in the office is: “If I don’t speak up in meetings, then I won’t say anything that my boss might disagree with, therefore I don’t risk making them unhappy and will keep my job.” In this scenario the life script is ‘be quiet’ and it keeps you safe by ensuring you don’t upset anyone and cause conflict. ⬅️

But what it’s actually doing is leaving you feeling frustrated and annoyed at yourself for not voicing your opinions and ideas. Especially when someone else voices the same ideas you had and then you're beating yourself up for having not spoken up.

But the good news is, these life scripts are not fixed. Just like all habits, you can ditch the ones that are no longer serving you and create new ones…and I can help. 🤌

Put yourself first today and invest in your mindset. Drop me a DM with the word MINDSET to find out more about all the way you can work with me in March.

And keep your eyes peeled for an exciting new service I’m launching this week 👀

Lots of love,

Tanya