ARE YOU FEELING LONELY?

If you are feeling lonely, please do not feel bad. You are NOT ALONE. Forty percent of the adults in America feel lonely. Out of this 37% people are adult men, and 35% adult women. Women tend to connect with family and friends better than men. The former Surgeon General of America Dr.Vivek Murthy recently told CBS that he struggled with loneliness as a child. He thinks that loneliness could pose a threat as a public health crisis, if we do not address this issue seriously. When Britain decided to leave European Union more than a year ago, Many Europeans jokingly said that Britain will be isolated and left alone after the Brexit. But the fact is that there are over nine million people in Britain who are experiencing loneliness. British Prime Minister Theresa May acknowledged this fact in British Parliament when she said that loneliness is a sad reality of modern life. Now Britain is considered the Loneliness capital of Europe. No wonder that British Government recently appointed a Minister for loneliness to combat this growing danger facing the nation.

EMOTIONAL LONELINESS: Very often emotional loneliness is experienced by people who have no one to share their pains. This could include to a great extent old people whose spouses have departed from this world, or who are very sick and still seek some one to talk to or share their experiences with. Generally young widows and widowers find some knid of friendship or relationship to keep life going smoothly. But as people get old, they become more isolated and far removed from the social landscape. Many time time being retired, and having limited financial resources also keeps a lid on their ability to seek new social connections. This is a very big problem all over the world as the size of family is shrinking and the loved ones move away from ancestoral homes and towns in search of greener pasters.

SOCIAL LONELINESS: Social loneliness is an extension of the emotional loneliness. Generally if family members are far away and unreachable, people have good friends at work or in their neighborhood with whom they connect on a regular basis. People who are retired do not connect with people at work. The intensity of friendship deteriorates when regular contacts are not maintained or when friends move away due to financial or social reasons. The emergence of micro families and the indifference to early marriages also contribute to overall loneliness in the society.

MODERN WORK PLACE: Many of the members of the workforce today are telecommuting, or work from a remote location thereby snapping the chances of social contacts at work. People who sit in front of the computer for hours together are making good money, but the price they pay for the remote employment is beyond their comprehension. Of course the Corporate Deity is saving millions of dollars in rental expenses, as the employees find their "habitat" in the corner of a Star Bucks or Dunkin Donut. Can you imagine a professional making more than a hundred thousand dollars a year working out of a coffee shop? Our ancestors would have laughed at that idea let alone allowing something like that to happen. But this is the stark reality that the modern day professional is facing. There is no wonder that social disorder like loneliness is threatening the health and well being of millions of people all over the world.

LONELINESS HOTLINE?

Pretty soon we will witness mushroom growth of "Loneliness Hotlines" set up by Charities and public health agencies to introduce preventive measures to combat the health and well being issues growing out of loneliness. People need to connect at the family level and social level to satisfy the inner craving for love and attention. At the extreme level, loneliness can become a mental disorder threatening the very existence of the individual. We all need to love, and to be loved. It is the basic essence of human life. The more you love, and the more you are loved, you feel "wanted". Being wanted is the fundamental reason why each one of us is living in the world.

By setting up the Loneliness Hotline, to a great extent, we can prevent the social disasters of massive suicides and dangerous levels of depression in the socity. Specially trained "love givers" can man those facilities and make sure that every caller is like a family member craving to be loved and cared for. But as long term solution we need to introduce courses at the High School Level to deal with loneliness at a younger age. This type of training will not only prepare the youth for the realities of later life waiting for them, but it will help them rechannelise their life from the roads of loneliness to the halls of harmony, healing and robust health. It is said that more than obesity, loneliness can reduce the life span of older population as they see no reason to live. Hopefully society as a whole can foresee the dangers of loneliness, that can wreck the very sanctity of humanity. We all claim to be the most intelligent creation of Almighty God, and if we can not help our brethren to understand that holiness of life, by sharing and caring ,the millions that we earn and save do not have any real purpose. The whole world will become barren, AND DRY once there is no love to give, and no compassion to show.

Loneliness, if correctly understood can be solved at the individual level. Especially for the less vulnerable ones, it is easy to handle at the personal level. Really speaking loneliness can be called a mind management problem.

Loneliness, if left unchecked can lead to serious mental disorders. It starts with lack of enthusiasm, finding excuses to stay out of touch with friends and families, and mostly glued to TV and computer. Social interaction is a very essential part of healthy living! "No man is an island" is a very true and factual statement. There are certain professions where people get isolated and immersed in hours of lonely work, and those professions include Research Scientists, Attorneys and certain computer professionals. The increasing loneliness in the workplace is becoming an alarming mental health issue, and if left untreated or ignored it could explode as a major public health issue. Many employers have started taking note of this HR crisis. They encourage team work, and facilitate employees coming together after work to celebrate corporate events like birthday parties, promotions and corporate achievements. Hopefully HR departments will institute programs to address the issues of corporate lonliness, and resulting productivity issues.

WHAT IS LONELINESS? Being alone and being lonely are two different things. I personally feel many times alone,but almost never feel lonely. Loneliness is the personal expression of negative thoughts accumulating at the bottom of one's mind. Just like darkness is created by the absence of light, negative thoughts are the outcome of lack of enough positive thoughts to negate them or displace them. Of course it is human nature to entertain lots of negative thoughts during the course of the day. But when they take command of your mind for a prolonged period of time, it becomes a real problem. We can always afford to be alone, may be due to work or other activities, yet feel connected and not lonely. When you are connected with the loved ones, and the circle of friends at work or otherwise socially, you do not feel lonely. Occasional loneliness is not the issue here. When it becomes a chronic problem, loneliness can assume untold proportions making them affect the personal well being of the individual.

WHAT IS THE SOLUTION?

The only solution that can last long for any individual is a paradigm shift. Your outlook towards life has to change to embrace the possibilities of social connectivity. The fundamental conflict in any individual is the direct outcome of TSA misalignment. TSA stands for Thought, Speech, and Action. Your thought, speech and action have to align like stars in the sky. This is the fundamental solution for erasing mental conflicts.You think bad about a person(for whatever reason), and you speak good about him or her, and your action does not support the speech or thought. Almost all of us goes through this experience in our daily life.My friends always ask me a question: "Gopi, my boss is a jerk. How can I feel good about him when I say good morning, for the sake of TSA alignment"? My answer always is that it is your opinion that your boss is a jerk. The more you think about it as a real fact, the more it will become your reality. Instead of thinking that your boss is a jerk (it is your opinion) from today onwards think that he is a good person and say good morning to him, meaning what you say in every sense. This change in your thought can produce amazing results, because really speaking life is a self fulfilling prophecy! By practicing TSA alignment in daily life, we all can reduce the conflicts substantially and pave the bricks of harmony and peace in daily life.

HEALTHY EATING!

You are what you eat! The type of foods that you eat can influence the way you think, and the types of thoughts you entertain. Healthy eating also includes healthy drinking too. Instead of consuming lots of sugary drinks, drink lots of pure water and stay hydrated. The amount of sugar in our drinks can play havoc in our thought process. We must include lots of greens, fruits and vegetables in our daily diet. Moderation and portion controls are the cardinal principles of healthy diet! This will go a long way to give you a very healthy body and a clean mind.

HEALTHY SLEEPING!

We all need seven to eight hours of healthy sleeping to keep our sanity. The perils of sleep deprivation and their long term effects on the health and well being are very well known. You need quite sleep time, without distractions. As far as possible sleep in a dark room, and even if you have to use your cell phone during the night, keep it in another room. If you can avoid TV in the bed room, by all means do it. Your sleep will thank you for that! Stop watching movies, and using computers at least half hour before you go to sleep. If nothing else, pace back and forth for fifteen minutes before sleep time. Try to sleep at the same time, at the same place. Try to wake up also at the same time. While we all live in the modern age of data and more data, and speed and more speed, adequate sleep is a prerequisite for healthy living and well being. Nobody can do it for you except yourself! A very sad fact indeed!

HEALTHY EXERCISE!

While we are all prone to the sedantry life style, it is essential to have at least a few hours of exercise every week.Even if you do not eat healthy and sleep well, if you follow healthy exercise at least four five time a week, it will ensure your health and well being.If you do regular exercise like aerobic exercise, brisk walking running etc you will be hungry so that you will eat healthy food. You can also induce a good nights sleep if you have good exercise on a regular basis. If you have not been doing exercise, it is a good idea to enroll in a GYM and have a personal trainer for two to three months. The money that you spend on a personal trainer is a very good investment for your health and well being. Ask a very wealthy dying man, he will be happy to part with his wealth for your robust health. As a matter of fact, wealth can be enjoyed only with good health. Do not forget that. Really speaking health must be our first wealth!

When you embark on a journey of good eating, good sleeping and good exercise you are declaring a war on loneliness! Social connectivity is a piece of cake for a very healthy individual. Who does not want to be around a healthy looking vibrant man or a woman!? Rome was not built in a day. "the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step" says the Chinese. So we all can take the single step today to combat the problem of loneliness, by creating an awareness of healthy eating, healthy sleeping, and healthy exercise! This is the ultimate solution for the otherwise deadly looking, mental health crisis evolving out of chronic loneliness.

MAY THERE BE PEACE AND TRANQUILITY AMONG ALL BEINGS IN THE UNIVERSE!OM!PEACE!PEACE!PEACE!